A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend of one year recently started a new job. He is an extremely friendly and social person, just as a part of his personality. He told me a week into the job that he was getting vibes from his boss that she might be interested in him. She came on rather aggressively 2 weeks in, insisting that they go get coffee together so she would answer some job-related questions my boyfriend had for her. During that coffee break, she started asking him if he liked basketball (potentially small talk), but then asked if he would take her sometime to a game. He told me that he immediately began to talk about having a girlfriend to give her the hint, but she kept suggesting other out-of-office activities and he said she became very flirty, laughing at all his jokes and hanging on his every word. This lunch break turned into a 2-hour event, and my boyfriend immediately told me he felt kind of awkward about the situation. In fact, walking back from the coffee break, he said several co-workers seemed perplexed as to what he was doing. Since then, she has added him on social networking sites, tags along with him to lunch oftentimes, and often stops by his cubicle to talk about office related topics, while squeezing in some short small talk. My boyfriend said that many of the people in the office see that it is rather obvious that she is interested in him.He also made it clear that he cannot confront her about it making him uncomfortable because she is his immediate boss and they have to work together on a daily basis, and he does not make things even more awkward between them. Plus, she hasn't "sexually harassed" him or anything that overtly inappropriate. My boyfriend wants to go with his department for happy hour in the near future to get to know all his co-workers better, but she will be there. I cannot tag along (and am not very interested in it anyway) as it is sort of a work social. Is it smart for my boyfriend to play along with her flirtacious attitude as long as it never leaves the workplace? What should he do about work-related social events?
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co-worker, flirt, workplace Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Love Sparta +, writes (15 June 2013):
Honesty is the best policy. He's gonna have to let her down politely. Who knows what kind of person she could be. I would even take the right measures regarding the possibility of being fired if she doesn't get her way with him. Like workers rights or something. If she's full on now, she will be worst in the future. And she's creating a problem in the workplace. The last thing your boyfriend wants to think going into work is .... "Right, so how am I going to avoid my boss who wants to fuck me bad".
A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (4 June 2013):
Its very easy to set boundaries at work if that's what you're true goal is.
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