A
female
age
30-35,
*ucysFlowers
writes:My b/f Paul likes collecting birds and I am not sure I can take it any more. He already has one cage of birds. His father collects them too. But I have asthma and i dont like be near the birds and all the feathers and it smells. But when he is away from the birds he is very nice. my Mother does not like his Mum as my Mum says she has too many boyfriends. Paul's father has been married three times. Paul loves visiting his father but i dont know what to do. Paul thinks im jus being a idiot to be scared to come near the birds. but Paul has never has ashthma. I have liked him since i was 14 but we have only been together since last year. But it is not just the birds. Paul took me to buy some new birds at a shop and i never realised how much the girl at the bird shop flirts with him. And she does like birds. Now I am worried I will lose Paul to this girl who does like birds. I don't know what to do.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, LucysFlowers +, writes (6 May 2011):
LucysFlowers is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you so much moinonplus and the male reader anonymous. The day after this Paul said if I really loved him i would help him more with his birds. So I put on a mast over my nose and Paul said i looked stupid. but i did my best. and even with the white thing over my nose the big cage stunk. and then i saw a mouse and i screamed and Paul told me that i was upsetting his birds and to go home. and i walked all the way home crying and i was so upset at him and never never called. nothing? nothiing at all.and i go upset and now i don't know where i am. i texted him and hes still ignoreing me and i feel so stupid and now my mother said if Paul keeps upsetting you to think about what i like about Paul. And I had to use my puffer and extra time adn i felt all breathless So you may be right moinonplus perhaps i dont have much in common because now i think the birds are horrible
But away from the birds Paul is funny and very nice to me When he is talking to me.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2011): If your relationship affects your health...well let it fly away.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 April 2011): Hmm... if you were getting married he would have to choose between you and the birds, and if he loves birds that much that may be a tough choice. But, right now you're probably not thinking that far ahead.
It sounds like you have a nice time together when you're not around the birds. So why not spend more time together away from them? If they make you physically uncomfortable, he should compromise and spend more time with you elsewhere.
You and Paul probably have a lot in common, and you love each other. Bird shop girl has one thing in common with him, the love for birds, and she flirts with him. You win.
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