A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is on a lads holiday at the moment and last night he dropped me a message that he had to be honest and on his first night he had kissed another girl but it didn't mean anything. I told him I was glad he told me but I wasn't going to pretend I'm not upset and he can't really say more than sorry. I couldn't get through to him later so I called up his mate who covered for him saying it was just a joke. I finally got through to my boyfriend who was annoyed I'd called his mate and said I shouldn't be annoyed his mate lied to me. Everytime I talk to him it's like he is fishing for an argument he keeps telling me to have a go at him etc and I said no cus I want to talk it over reasonably. He hasn't been like this at all before in the whole time we've been together and I don't know what to do. I try to let him know I'm not angry but I am upset and he just keeps turning it on me by making it seem like I'm over reacting when I'm not I literally can't get a word in edge ways. Yes I am upset about this but I just want to forgive and forget but he seems to want drama about it. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 August 2013):
 yep he's trying to get you to break up with him... to do his dirty work...
when he gets home you can forgive and forget but I'm betting his bad behavior will continue till you can't take any more...
be prepared for this to end sooner rather than later.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 August 2013):
 Sounds to me that he wants YOU to be the one to end the relationship.
I don't think he lied, I think his mate did, to cover for him.
Way way juvenile.
I'd ignore his calls and have a chat when he gets home. That gives you both some time to figure out if this is what you want or not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2013): You have to take back you power in this situation. He has the advantage of distance and you're confused between what is true and what isn't. He is covering his tracks by playing mind games with you.
What he is hoping for, is that by the time he returns you are all worn out and ready to forgive and forget. He isn't just looking for drama, he wants it all out now. So it's done and gone by the time he's back.
You can stop talking to him now. Ignore his text messages until you have your feelings under control; and you can think straight. He's being a stupid boy, and he's playing with your feelings. He is also flattered knowing you're jealous. So don't feed him anymore drama. He's enjoying it.
You have a choice to forgive and forget about it; or you can end it, and find a new boyfriend. The choice depends on how you still feel when he comes back.
Right now, don't let him take over all your thoughts. Call your girlfriends and have a girls day out. Get him out of your head for awhile. Have some fun and some laughs. You're too young to be so serious about a relationship. He's just a boy, not your husband.
Go make a day for yourself. No boyfriend drama, just you and your friends.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (24 August 2013):
 Sound to me he is either trying to get you to break m or trying to be the big man with a little woman in front of his mates.
Either way he is being juvenile. I would suggest you leave him and his mates to get on with their lads vacation, don't call him, let him call you .... (or text), be brief, tell him how lovely it is to hear from him but you don't want to keep him away mates and fun and terminate the call.
While he is gone have a good long think about what you want from a relationship (I hope respect and faithfulness are high on your list) and what you are prepared to accept.
If his behaviour and your lists don't match, you know what to do.
good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2013): Don't text him for the duration of the trip, leave him be to the holiday, you could just text and say, "I'll talk to you when you get back" and just leave it at that. Or if he does text you, just say "sorry can't talk, very busy, see you soon".
In the meantime, try to occupy yourself with stuff you like to do, whatever you need to do to distract yourself, music, walks etc.
See what happens when he gets back, give it time and see what he says, whether you believe him or not, is up to you, but don't settle for crap.
On a lads holiday all of that stuff generally tends to go down, so it's really your decision on how you feel about it and your relationship, but just remember that no one is worth you feeling upset!
Just take a step back and try to focus on the other things in your life, listen to your favourite music, try some new make-up tutorials (that's what I like doing) do some cooking or baking, go for walks etc. Just see how you feel about it after he gets back, but I think you're only making the situation more difficult by trying to ring an text him while he's on holiday. Cool it off for some time and let him sweat!
Good Luck with it xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 August 2013): He wants u to get mad n dump him, so he can do what he wants on holidays guilt free. He'll prob try n get back together when he is back do ur self a favour n forget him
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