A
female
age
30-35,
*nnomus28
writes:hi im 17 and my boyfriend is 21. i found out today that he has aspergers i have tried to look online to find more information but find it diffficult to understand all of the medical terms that are used. some of the symptoms that are described though i cant seem to see that he has them. i would really love some advice and more information as i dont know if i should talk to him about it or not as we have only been going out for a month, anything would be helpful thanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, annomus28 +, writes (4 July 2010):
annomus28 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you for your advice it did really help i spoke to him about it and he was able to explain it to me once again thank you
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010): Those with Asberger's have a very tough time understanding and perceiving emotions, and the contexts connected with speech. Sarcasm, for instance, would not come easily to or be noticed by someone with Asberger's. It has been mistaken in the past that people with Asberger's are antisocial, impolite, or inappropriate, when in fact it is very difficult for this person to successfully communicate beyond the literal meaning of spoken utterances. You may notice in your time with him that he is not quick to the natural process of limbic relativity, which is the emotional response mirroring that of another, such as "contagious" laughter, queasiness if someone is sick, or a tear to see someone cry. I have known a few people in my time who've had this. All of them were incredibly intelligent and not incapable of developing lasting relationships, so it isn't necessarily inhibiting, but in cases of extreme joy or distress they may come off as cold, when in fact they are just incapable of reaching such emotional highs themselves, thus cannot relate. Of the many books available, I recommend The Biology of Love to better understand how the scientific and psychological elements relate.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 July 2010): I am the mother of an Asperger's child. Asperger's is a disorder on the mild end of the autistic spectrum, which generally effects social skills
. Did he tell you that he has Asperger's? Or did you find out some other way? If he told you, ask him about it! Asperger's effects different people different ways, so he could best tell you how it effects him.
If you found out some other way, keep doing what you're doing... learn about it! Be there to support him, and most of all, be understanding!
Good luck!
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