A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello everyone. I have a question that requires very honest and authentic advice from people who may have had similar experience that I am having. Last week, I was flying from Doha (UAE) to USA. I was at the terminal sitting all by myself. There was a 3 hour sitting time on the airport when I saw this sweet girl sitting all by herself. After a lot of effort, I finally went to her and said hi. She and I immediately started talking and we talked about everything. She told me that she was going to be a permanent resident of USA from a lottery Visa and I told her how I was coming back from a vacation from Pakistan. She is from Nepal so we had the same language as well.We talked for hours and she laughed whole heartedly on my jokes. She was relaxed and comfortable. When we boarded our plane, I promised her that I will do anything to get her seat with me and I did it. I requested people and got her seat exchanged. We had a 14 hours flight. We barely slept for 2,3 hours because all we wanted to do was talk and laugh. She told me about her family and I did the same. We showed each other pictures of our families. Several times during the flight, I held her hand. She let me hold them because she said that she usually has cold hands. For hours, I held her hands. I even kissed her hand and told her how pretty she was.We exchanged numbers and email addresses. On the terminal, she told me that she was completely single and that there used to be a guy sometime ago who was just a crush. I kept telling her how long distance relations never work since she told me that some of her friends had LDRs.However when we landed, we got separated at the immigration booth since our visas were different. She had that dead sad look in her eyes when I left her but I told her that we will meet up and be together again very soon. In the plane, I joked and said many times: "Looks like I am successful so far in winning you over" and she innocently kept saying "Yes a little bit. You are getting there"It has been one week since this and we have been texting everyday :)Here is the problem. Most of it is from me. It seems that she is not that much involved as I am. It might be worth it to state here that she has come here all alone to a her father's friend's family so she might be hesitant as what to tell them who she is talking to.MY BIGGEST PROBLEM: Yesterday after asking many times for her facebook ID for many days, she finally added me but immediately said and I quote: "Please don't judge me. I have a boyfriend. Oh God I cannot believe I finally told you. I am sorry I could not tell you on the flight because you kept saying long distance relations never work. I met him in Nepal shortly before coming to USA and that I want to give this relation with him a chance atleast"I told her that it is not a big deal and I have not judged her at all.I have not stopped talking to her. I know LDRs never work. I don't bring him and her relation into our chats. All I know I am a very loving guy and I know that she felt a lot of things when I held her hands and kissed them.Please tell me what to do. I am very confused and I don't want to let her go. Since she told me, she has been more reserve with me but I am trying my best to put jokes in messages and make her laugh. I am an engineer and want to be the one she counts on. I want to support her in USA. I want to show her places. I want to take her out and go on long drives. Want to give all my love to her because I have been rejected by the girls here for the last 4 years. Someone finally felt something for me and I don't want to lose her. She is living very close to me. Just a few miles away. Please help me. Please.
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 October 2014): Sorry to hear you have been rejected for the last four years by girls where you live. Get out there and meet more women. Join clubs, organizations, etc.
The girl you met on the plane said she wants to give the relationship with her bf a chance, but she is texting you every day. Re-read the paragraph where you quoted her as as saying "please don't judge me………. " Read the entire paragraph. She is sneaky and sly.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2014): I don't usually respond but your story touched me so I hope I can help.Your post is not about the girl.It is about you. And you summed the whole story thus;'I am an engineer and want to be the one she counts on. I want to support her in USA. I want to show her places. I want to take her out and go on long drives. Want to give all my love to her because I have been rejected by the girls here for the last 4 years. 'In short, you are professionally successful but feel desperately lonely being far away from your family. You are disappointed by the rejections you've had and you just want somebody to love. You are in a vulnerable position. You would have 'fallen in love' with any woman who smiled at you.As for this woman you met. I'm sorry to say but she is using you. Unfortunately there are people like her who don't mind misleading others just to get an ego stroke. As you are well aware, her actions do not suggest that she is seriously interested in you.Not only that but she lied to you and is cheating on her boyfriend with you by carrying on an inappropriate relationship. So, because you are emotionally vulnerable, you fell for someone who's out to use you.I suggest you start joining societies and organisations and sports teams to meet people with similar interests. Open up to people and go to social gatherings more. You never know when you'll meet someone nice. You definitely won't meet them by staying at home and complaining about how the American girls don't like you.Delete this girl's details and start socialising more.
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