A
female
age
30-35,
*ookWyrmGirl
writes:Okay, there is a long story behind this question, so please bare with me while I try to summarize it: Basically, my current boyfriend is friends with his ex-girlfriend/my ex-best friend. Me and my boyfriend (I'll call him Eugene), have done a lot of stupid stuff to each other. We've hurt each other a lot. I lied to him about what I did with this one guy, Patrick, but it was before Eugene and I started to date. I was trying to choose between Eugene and Patrick, and when Eugene found out from my, at the time, best friend (Beth), he got mad and just didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore. So, I went to Patrick for comfort and, stupid me, started to date him. Beth liked Eugene, and more or less pounced on the opportunity to go with him. I wanted to stop being his friend when they started to date, because I knew I'd end up breaking them up. Which, I did. Patrick and I had an agreement, since he thought we'd break up when college started, and he understood my stance. Eugene still liked me and I still really liked him, but he wanted to build up trust between him and I before we tried anything. It got to the point where I broke up with Patrick for Eugene, because Eugene said he'd break up with Beth while he and I worked out our feelings. The problem was, Beth surprised him by visiting him. (She and I live out of state from him). Sooo...Eugene broke this promise we made to each other, where we wouldn't do anything with Beth or Patrick, sexually. It hurt me, a lot. He called me the next morning, told me what happened, broke up with her that evening. Yet, since then, problems galore have popped up and Eugene will not stop being Beth's friends. He even still had feelings for her while dating me! Granted, I haven't been the best girlfriend with the situation, but it's hard to cope when your boyfriend is hanging out with someone who back-stabbed you in the past for him. So, recently, I haven't been able to cope with the feelings. I get totally irrational when they try to hang out and I just want him to stop being her friend. It's too much on me, emotionally, to take. But he refuses to. Even though, he claims I'm his priority and he wants to be with me. He's even moving to my state to be with me, but I've done a lot, too, to bend over backwards and attempt to deal. So, what should I do? And if this is too confusing, or if anyone wants the full detailed story, feel free to message me or tell me. I didn't put the details here, because it's even longer than this still awfully long summary. _
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female
reader, Teacake +, writes (24 November 2008):
 This is why people should stick to one person and stop meddling in other's affairs. No way out of this mess until you meet a different set of people and don't create so much drama.
This is a learning situation. Hopefully you learned and won't repeat these mistakes again.
good luck!
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