A
female
age
30-35,
*inkRosesBloom
writes:Does anyone here have any experience with making out with guys they've just met...? Or like a ONS, but only going so far as to makeout? Or, have you even gone back to their apartments, and still only went as far as making out? Did the guys get angry at all that you didn't go any farther, and how did you make it clear to them that you didn't want to anyway? Any help is appreciated! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, PinkRosesBloom +, writes (21 June 2014):
PinkRosesBloom is verified as being by the original poster of the question Mark1978: Thank you!! Exactly the advice I was hoping for.
A
male
reader, Mark1978  +, writes (20 June 2014):
 Hi
As im from the UK im guessing the term "making out" means passionate kissing, fondling, etc but not actual sex? I will base my response on that basis, forgive my ignorance if the language difference makes me misunderstand the term.
If you are looking for more than friends but less than sex, then Honeypie has it spot on - DONT go back to a mans house or flat. DO NOT get into a car either. Once you get into a private, secluded situation, either he may think that as you have gone back to his place you have given him the green light OR you will get carried away and end up doing something you regret later on.
When it comes to boundaries, its one thing making it clear verbally, but you need to also ensure you don't put yourself at risk. SOME men, especially ones you meet in bars and clubs, think that a woman going home with them is basically a signed contract to allow them to have sex. Once you are in their home they can then beg, force, persuade or charm you into doing more than you are happy with. SOME men can be all charm and kindess in public, then animals once they close the front door. No should mean No, but its worth reinforcing the point with your own actions.
Yes there are many men who are happy to only go as far as you are happy with. BUT many men who are not. The former would probably not ask you round their home early on, the latter would, but that's by no means always the case.
Mark
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A
female
reader, PinkRosesBloom +, writes (20 June 2014):
PinkRosesBloom is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to the both of you for answering.
Yes, I'll be really careful about making sure guys know my boundaries. Speaking of which, it was really cool to get an answer from a guy!!! I'm happy to know there are guys who can enjoy simple stuff too.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2014): I am a male and I have ons's. I don't want sex per se, only kissing and cuddling etc. I also get worried that a girl would be upset about no sex. As a male, I must be quite unusual, but the shoe can be on the other foot..
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (18 June 2014):
 If you are ONLY looking to "make out" then DO NOT go back to his place. BEcause even IF you bend it in neon and tell him in 20 foot letter that you DON'T WANT to go further then making out, he will (possibly) assume that he can "change" you mind once you get to his place.
Also if this is a "random" stranger don't you know better than to walk off into the night with him?
And telling a guy, you are really lovely, but I don't want to go any further then my tongue down your throat - I'm not looking or WANTING sex. BE upfront about it. Otherwise you will be perceived as a tease.
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