A
male
age
41-50,
*ikdepik
writes:Hi!I have this great girlfriend that I have met during study in Italy. After a while we started having a great relationship knowing it was gonna be hard because she lives in Mexico and I in Europe. On the other hand it is totally worth it because we are great together! I have been able to visited her sometimes and i will study in Mexico next year so we can be more together...However, we do have some religious issues in our relationship... She is catholic and i have never been religious at all... We never had any problems about this, but now it seems to get more of a problem, because her mother doesnt want her daughter to be with a non-catholic, although she thinks i am a great person! I know i cant 'just' become a catholic as well, altough i would do everything to make this relationship keep working! The problem is that we both truly love each other, but because i havent been raised as a catholic since birth i can never be allowed by her mother and the mexican catholic church isnt very easy in mixed marriages too! My girlfriend tells me that if i want to continue there are gonna be huge obstacles... Does this mean she will still leave me an option? She knows i would always respect her faith and everything that she will need practicing her believes and that i always will be on her side to help her with that...Just, what am i supposed to do right now??? I love her, she loves me! ...how can i work this out with her? ...i already went to a priest myself...Thanks! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Miss Potter  +, writes (10 March 2008):
 Hi there! Well catholics are christians and I assume you are christian as well (orthodox maybe?) although you are agnostic there shoudnt really be any HUGE obstacles. But let me tell you one thing - religion can be a big issue if you dont agree on some major things. My current boyfriend split up with his wife because of the religion issues (amongst the other ones lol) Your girlfriend says it might be an obstacle, she might be just cautious or maybe she doesnt really believe in the seriousness of this relationship?? Anyway, once you are in Mexico, you will be able to judge everything for yourself, whether it will be a big issue or not! For now, dont stress over it too much as you say you love each other dearly, but at the same time, try to get her opinion on the religion and what she thinks is truly important to her...maybe she will tell you something that will put YOU off her straight away?Hope this helps x
A
female
reader, LoveStruckPanda323  +, writes (19 February 2008):
 Wow. You're such a loving boyfriend. It would be awful if you two wouldn't be able to stay together. And don't think your girl would just give up with out a fight over a precious jem like you. Granted you shouldn't HAVE to believe in God to be with your girl. And you do not HAVE to believe in God to be in love. But what you just stated was that due to big things that just happened in your life that you are starting to believe? And that you also want to be apart of your girlfriend's life including the religous one. You need to tell these things to her and her mother. There will need to be alot of compromise as stated earlier but I think it is a goal that can and will be accomplished. Most importantly no matter how rough things get always try to compromise to the benefit of both parties. And always let her know that you will always be behind in whatever decision that she makes 100% and that you being a Non-Catholic, and a shall we say "Somewhat Non-Believer?" that you will NEVER get in the way of her religious practices. Keep me posted on what happens. I'm going to add you as friend. I'd like to hear how everything turns out. =)
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A
male
reader, dikdepik +, writes (17 February 2008):
dikdepik is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhey thanks for your answer! ...i will try to talk with her mother when i am going to mexico in the hope that will make the situation more clear or hopefully better! Her father passed away though, which is really sad... The reason of my question was, because i am afraid she is actually gonna end our relationship because she is being forced... I know she loves me and i know that even her mother loved me when i actually met her, but some things are really hard to change. They know i am not catholic and as you assumed, no i do not actually believe in god at all. ...at least, not until some pretty big occasions happened in my life recently... Now i dont actually know anymore what is the truth, but if i actually start going to believe in god, then i do think it should be my own choice and not because of my girlfriend or anyone else because they cannot change who i am... However, I want her to be a good catholic and i want to share everything with her and her family! I want her to love me, but always love god and jesus as well! ...I just wanna be part of it!
Thanks Again!
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A
female
reader, LoveStruckPanda323 +, writes (17 February 2008):
Have you tried talking her mother about it? Or her parish? I think that when you can, like when you go to study in Mexico. You need to sit down with her and her family and talk things over. Maybe you can come to a mutual understanding. Maybe you could attend church with her a few times see how you like it. And do you believe in God at all? If you don't then it's going to be even harder to get through everything. And the only reason I think that she would ever leave you (bye the sounds of it) is if she was forced to. But if you were to get married in a Catholic church as I believe you probably will if it happens, then you might have to be confirmed. I'm not sure on that. But I know both my mother and father had to be confirmed in the Catholic church before the Pastor would do the service and marry them. That however would be something you would have to look into. But as for what you should do right now..Stick it out. If you two really love each other than nothing will come in your way. Love can not be determined, by age, sex, nationality, nothing at all. You can't help who you love and it would be wrong if her mother and others didn't let you just for not being Catholic. But I'm pretty sure that there can be some kind of compromise in this situation.I'm not sure if this helped any. But you have my wishes and good luck!!
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