A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I met a woman that I work with after returning from some vacation time. She was beautiful. But, I figured I didn't really have a chance with her, i wouldn't even try. I had heard she was married and didn't want to pursue her because it would have been against my rules. So I didn't. About a week later she gets into contact with me. She tell me she is still legally married but aside from that she feels her marriage is over. We start talking and hangout and find out that we really enjoy spending time with each other over the course of a couple of months. Then, finally we start to make things physical. We are lying there together when both of our phones start going off. Her ex had gotten onto their joint phone plan and found my number. he also went to our work. Since then she keeps saying she is so confused and doesn't know what she wants. She has been isolating me for almost a month now and it's tearing me apart. She says she doesn't know how to progress because either way it isn't fair to anyone. My only thought is that she is going to have to make a decision. Personally I think it would help if she spent time with both of us. That way she could find out what was actually there in both cases. Any suggestions
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2010): Really she is the one who strayed from a relationship and she is the one who needs to sort herself out. Meanwhile, stay out of it and find someone who is actually available for a proper relationship.
That's the trouble with sex. It created a bond, sometimes with the wrong person.
A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (7 December 2010):
 Move on. Rebound relationships don't work. You are either helping her to ease back into the dating world or helping her ease back into a relationship with her husband. Plus, if she was so certain her marriage was over why is she worried about being fair to her husband, hmm?
Take this as a life lesson.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 December 2010): Sounds like she doesn't want to hurt anyone and is confused because she doesn't know if she wants to leave the man she has had a history and long relationship with or give up on the man that she just started to get to know and really like. I say you tell her to not worry about anyone but herself. To do what makes her happy and not worry about hurting people. Then tell her you arent going to wait for her forever and you understand whatever she chooses. By saying you arent going to wait for her for too long (say it in a nice way btw) will make her have to make up her mind quicker and therefore if she is really afraid of losing you and unhappy in her marriage she will go for you. (just my personal experience)- I was in a long relationship and I met someone new who I fell really hard for. I was unhappy in my original relationship and was trying to decide if I should end things. when the new girl I fell for said she wasn't sure how long she could wait for me I knew I would rather be happy with her than unhappy in the relationship I was in.
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