A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:hi there, im 21 and me and my parnter have been together for quite a while now. i really enjoy sex with him but i want to take it to a new level. we've talked about role play and S and M but i get really shy when it comes down to it. i really want to please him and myself becasue i know i'll enjoy it i just dont have the balls to do it. does anyone know how i can boost my confidence? please help its so embarassing at this age to still be shy about the bedroom :(
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionim not shy when talking about it, its just when it comes down to it, i mean half the time i ask him to turn the other way when i get changed!!!!! im so paranoid about my body and my skin ( as i have psoriasis pretty bad all over) and im worried he'll laugh or make fun if i were to do something wrong in the bedroom ( if you get what i mean) i just need a confidence boost. i mean he tells me im beautiful despite the imperfections i.e. my skin condition but i still cant help being insecure and self consious. and i dont want that putting a wedge between us.... please helpthanks
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (7 June 2011):
 Wait a second!
It's already established that you like sex and love to be close to your guy. That's good!
It's perfectly okay not to be comfortable with something when it's talked about. As for me, there is no way in hell that I'd go for S&M or being used as a toilet or any incest fantasy role playing. For S&M, hurting the one I love and having him hurt me doesn't get me off sexually. I know people who are into it, and I respect it, but it's not me. It's not being shy, but I wouldn't be comfortable.
Having said that, being sexually adventurous is a good thing, but only in the grounds that you're comfortable with it. It's good to please him, but don't feel pressured to do what you're not wanting to.
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