A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I have recently started hanging out with my ex-boyfriend. We had not seen each other in over 10 years. We dated and lived together for 4 years and I left him because we both were hot heads, young, immature and did not know how to compromise and make a relationship work. For the record....there was never any cheating and he was a very good boyfriend....we just did not want the same things in life at that time.I left him and I got married a couple of years later. He was very bitter about that. He would keep in contact with my brother over the years and 1 day, he ran into my brother.... and of course...my brother told him that I was divorced and he told him to pass his number on to me.He never married and seems very bitter about relationships. On the other hand, he is this funny, outgoing guy, well traveled, adventerous and has a good head on his shoulders, but I do believe he has been hurt a few times.... and it may have started with me. He has this gloomy perception of marriage and seems very sad when ever it comes up in conversation. He acts like he doesn't care, but yet he seems sad about it.We are not dating, although....I am found of him and I enjoy his company. He has started calling more often, hanging out with me and my kids. Whenever I need something done...he's right there...on the spot! However, we are not intimate, nor do we talk about being together as a couple, but yes, there is flirting and lots of talk about our past. He has made several references about me breaking his heart, but how much he loved me... back then...Now, I really don't know how I feel about him or if I should even waste my time with him, because this hard demeanor really turns me off. Is this just a front because he still has feelings for me? Or is this just who he is now???
View related questions:
divorce, flirt, immature, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (28 April 2012):
 It sounds like the past is still haunting him, you hurt him and maybe several other girls hurt him so he has this guard up now against woman and he won't allow himself to fall deeply again for now as he is scared of getting hurt again. I can see your worries but he is there for you and I am pretty sure he still has feelings for you. Take it slow, you are not wasting your time, you might be able to break through to him. If you have feelings for him then tell him. Talk about the past, why you done what you done, praise him, tell him he was a good boyfriend, give him back some more confidence, ask him how he feels about you, and tell him sometimes it worries you the comments he makes about love and marriage.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2012): I think it's just who he is now. apparently he has been unhappy in relationships for the last 10+ years, and that outlook will not change overnight. he may be interested in dating you but he's not going to jump right in, probably it'll take a long time because he's being cautious, and any 'misstep' on your part might send him running away. wait and see but don't get your hopes up. Things have changed.
...............................
|
