A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 18 years old and single. I am happy with life, have good friends. I have never had much luck with females. I asked a girl out two years ago and got rejected. I talk to girls but can't tell the signs if they're interested. If they flirt it just seems a game and nothing serious. If girls talk as friends it feels like thats how they want to keep it - as friends. If I fancy someone they are either taken or not interested. I just don't feel I will never get with anyone because I always misread signals. I'm not feeling lonely. I'm just wondering is she ever meant to come along. I've always believed she will but I'm beggining to seriously doubt it. I've never dated anyone and I wonder is it a bad thing a relationship or would I enjoy it? I just don't know.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): Almost certainly, most 18-year-old guys are in the same situation described in your opening sentence '18 years old and single'. Your second 'I am happy with life, I have good friends' shines from your post like a tower of light which illuninates all that follows as being not really a problem.
Lucky you. 18, happy with life, have tons of friends! So you're single. You talk to girls, but probably on a very matey level that doesn't come across as sexually forward, and neither you nor the girl goes out of your way to make it obvious you're pursuing the other. Not a big deal.
I understand absolutely that you're dying to meet girls and have relationships. You will, some day. For the moment, if you're a shy 18-year-old guy neither totally self-confident nor ridiculously good-looking nor visibly rich, you're unlikely to have huge success with women.
Society (TV, movies, gender equality, etc etc etc) has transformed the traditional boy-seeks-girl pattern into the inverse: essentially, women let men know when they're interested, leaving it up to the man to respond, and women will choose YOU when they want you.
Being a male virgin at 18 is entirely normal. Count your blessings, enjoy your life, and don't fret about the lack of girls. You have friends.....you are NEVER alone.
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