A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of 4yrs cheated on me during the summer vacation with a mate from her neighbourhood!the same girl that broke past my defences, taught me how to love and be loved the mother of my kid has given everything up just to be with this guy! the funny thing is she didnt fess up i caught her, i had the same dream 3 days consecutively and when i confronted her about it at first she said nothing happened but when i told her about the dreams she said nothing and told me she had a busy day and that its gona take long we should talk some other time. but she finally told me about this guy but claims that she didnt sleep with him n that she would have if we werent together anymore. she told me she broke up with him the day before, i was like hw convinient! she told me that he forced himself on her and had his dickhead inside her n stopped when she told him to. another thing is when he approached her he told her that i wasnt gna find out as long as she gives him some time its ok. so she agreed to his plan and said that he shouldnt call her and that she would. even on valentines day she called him. the 1st three days she was telling me how gud he treated her and then she was sorry she made a mistake she wont do it again! we have started counsilling its just too difficult trusting again. cut the story short i was gona propose to the 20 05 09 thats her 21st birthday! ive even introduced her to my family! my question is, is she really sorry or shes just sorry she got caught? wev are still together! pls help me!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2009): we are still together but its just like our counsellor said we have chosen d difficult path and that it requires a lot of work from us both! i can see that she is tryng but it seems lyk she knws jst how mch i value my relationship with her coz whenever we argue she wants to always b right! its like she knws her mistake bt 2 a certain extent! i really nid some good advice on how to handle this female! i really love her and i dont want to lose her! how do i make her want me again?
A
female
reader, healingprocess  +, writes (19 April 2009):
You know I am going through the same thing right now with my boyfriend of 12 year's and 4 children together, I know just how you feel, but I do beleive that you can earn trust back it just takes time and a long time, you will know deep in your heart if you want to spend the rest of your life with this female, if you want to talk about it I think she owes you that much just like my b/f owes it to me, but sometime I would much rather not talk about it hoping I will just forget, but it just builds up inside. Councelling is a good start too coming to a healing process. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 April 2009): seems like she only confessed because you caught her. from what you have written, this affair went on much longer and stronger than what she is actually admitting to. i think she actually did the deed with him, and that she will continue to. realise this, she has also been contacting him, she lied to you to cover up. this girl has been messing around with another man. she convieniently overs up and changes her stories. how can you now trust her. do you actually want to continue with a cheater, remember once a cheater always a cheater. in this girls case, it will be so true. better find out her true colours now before you propose, yes its hurting you, but better now before you pay fork out lobola and be made a fool. good luck.
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