A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:about a week or two ago my GF wanted to go on a break with me because she is depressed about having to get an abortion (we both want to have the baby but certain circumstances are making it impossible for us to have it) and she said feels like she needs to fix a few things about herself in order to for us to work because she's doesn't want to ruin our relationship.I was totally supportive and understanding. If she feels she needs to do this then I wont stop her. I told her i love her for who she is no matter what and that i think she's fine just the way she is. I didn't fight her on it, i didn't argue or make a huge dramatic thing about it. She said she still wants to be with me and will remain faithful to me. We were on good terms still.Before we were forced to schedule the abortion everything was like a fairytale. We've been really close for years before we got together and one day we just kinda happened. We are like the perfect match for one another. i know that sounds cliche.We made plans a few days ago to hang out today. We were supposed to take my dog to the vet at 3pm and then come back to my place to hang out for a little while. I texted her this morning to make sure we were still on for today and she said yes and that she wanted to visit a friend first before we hung out.3 minutes before the appointment she texted me to ask if she could bring the friend with to the vet and i asked her nicely to come by herself and that i have nothing against her friend. I told her i wanted to spend time with just her today. I even told her if she wanted to she can skip coming with me to the vet (since i was already there) and just come over to my place later on if she wants to hang with her friend a little bit longer. She said okay.i texted her a little while later to see if she's still coming over and i don't get a response for about 3 hours. (at this point she's been hanging out with that friend for 8 hours now) she calls me up and i ask what she's up to and if she's coming over still and she freaks out on me. She gets all angry and annoyed and tells me she's frustrated with me because i told her not to bring her friend earlier to my dogs vet appointment and that she's not coming over now because its too late and she doesn't want to drive to my place in the dark (even though it's still light out and she's driven over to my place in the dark countless times in the past). Naturally i'm upset about this but i remain calm and polite and i ask if there is any way i can see her still. she said no and that she's just gonna hang with her friend some more. She continued to say how frustrated she is with me and got even more angry at me. Then just hung up on me.Is it me, or does she just not want to see me and she's using any excuse she can to justify her actions? Between the time we made these plans and today we've been on good terms. Today totally threw me for a loop. It was so out of left field i just dont know what to make of her actions, words, and attitude with me.Any ideas whats going on in her head right now?Is it possible she said she still wants to be with me but didn't really mean it?
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female
reader, BunnyTee +, writes (10 June 2010):
 Sounds to me like what's going on in her head is a lot like complete confusion. It's understandable, given what you've stated here.
You've both been forced into a major decision and that's predictably, weighing on her mind.
I'd bet she was talking to her friend, her emotions bubbled up and you called, right person, wrong time.
Of course, you have no way of knowing what's happening, so you feel blind-sided by a (most likely) emotional blind-siding.
I'd recommend letting the dust settle and then contacting her. I'm betting on emotional outburst due to heavy mitigating circumstance. Good luck and hang in there!
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