| A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I can't figure out if the girl I have been dating is interested in me or not. She tells personal things, she really opens up to me, and we have a great time together. We've slept together a few times, but not had sex, I've never made a move, and I told her bluntly that I'm not going to have sex until I feel somewhat stable with her. We kiss, we cuddle, we always have fun. The more I get to know her, the more I start to learn how gaurded she is, and how uncertain she is of herself, and her desires. I want to enter into a relationship with her despite this, although I want to do it slowly. Sometimes she'll go a whole day before answering a message from me. I find it frustrating because I give her adequate space, I never interogate her, or message or call that often, and when I do it's usually to confirm a date. She always acts very keen to go out, and if she can't, she's quick to reschedule. She genuinely seems excited to see me, and always invites in after a get together. I feel as though I'm the one iniating everything though. I take her flowers, and other things too, and sometimes she's seems utterly unappreciative. I love doing nice things for her, and treating her well, but I would like some recipocation, a small gesture to show that my affections are being enjoyed. My question is threefold:Is she interested?Is she testing me?Am I making an error by not pressing intimacy?I like, and respect her a lot, but I am prepared to cut my losses and walk away.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, sweetheart6  +, writes (4 November 2010):
Girls are highly complicated. Believe me! I have a great idea to help you get your answer. But you'll have to use your creativity.
I see that you've set yourselves a regular pattern. Dates, slepping in and accessorizing it with flowers and things. Maybe you're being too nice. All this time, you've just been sweet and you've seen her reaction to that! Maybe now, you should do something more on the wild side. Take her by surprise! Do something unexpected! Give her a motorbike ride or something (Be careful, though!). If she gets all "Yay!!", she's definitely the fun type. You can continue this with her and never get bored with it. If she runs, or gives you a negative reaction, it's a good opportunity for you to study it and understand her. Then you can make your decisions.
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