A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a brother (Rob), a sister-in-law (Tiffany), a niece and a nephew. I am close to my nieces and nephew who are now teenagers (I spend less time with them now since they spend more time with their friends which is a good thing but I still consider myself close to them). I used to babysit, take them to school, pick them up from school, take them places like the zoo. The problem is that my sister-in-law has a younger brother (Kyle) who has a son that is about a year old. I'm not related to Kyle in anyway and I don't even like him. Kyle expects me to babysit and treat his son like I treated my niece and nephew.There is reasons why I can't do that. For example, I changed jobs since my nieces and nephew were younger. I now work during the day instead of the night shift. So I don't have the schedule like I used to. I also don't feel comfortable babysitting children that I am not related to.I don't treat Kyle's son badly (I still buy him gifts).But am I being unreasonable by not planning on having the same relationship with my niece and nephew then with Kyle's son? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2024): You're not being unreasonable at all and need to mark your boundaries. Just tell your sister in law what you told us in the third paragraph and put the emphasis on the lack of time. There must be others in the family who can babysit - why you?
You could also point out that you spend less time with the others recently too.
Don't spend time with someone you don't like unless you absolutely have to.
I noticed you put names on a public forum and wonder whether you had thought that through. We don't need their names in order to try and help you.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2024): Your sister SIL and her brother are trying to use you. What's worse, I've seen cases where people like them treated women without children as if they were doing them a favor by asking them to babysit their kids!
Just be polite and tell them no once and for all. Do not explain!!! You don own anybody anything. Just no.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2024): Even Mary Poppins had her problems!
You can't be every child's fairy godmother but with the gift buying they might
assume you're up for it.
Just say no!
Say no to everyone involved.
"No, I can't do it. I've given up babysitting. "
"I'm sorry but it's a no from me!"
And REFUSE to be the local free babysitting service.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 June 2024):
 No, he is your SIL's nephew, not yours. Of course you do not OWE ANYONE to babysit their kid.
No, is a complete sentence, OP
If you don't WANT to babysit, say no. It's OK. If they (the SIL and her brother don't like it - tough cookies)
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A
male
reader, Myau  +, writes (11 June 2024):
 "Sorry dude I'm too busy".
Nuff said
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