A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Okay so I have a one month old baby. Me and the father were debating on getting back together and becoming a family when out of nowhere he texts me and says my son is about to have a little sister. The other woman only has 4 months to go until she gives birth. That was the drawing point for me, he says i was mean and moody and pushed him away the whole time i was pregnant and we were trying to be together.Then on top of it this whole time the baby has been here he knew he had another on the way. He said he was just a "sperm donor" and she wants nothing to do with him or let him see his daughter. if that was so why would she even text him the sex and the due date and say she'll call him when the baby is born? Am i overracting? he wasnt there for me at all when i was carrying his child and called me a slut, sai it probably wasnt his, everything else....but he brags about some random girl he got pregnant. Am i justified for being angry? and even a little hurt? Please help :(
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2012): A sperm donor? Come on! No young guy does that. He wouldn't know anyway who is child is. The guy's a complete jerk and doesn't care about you. Ditch `em!
A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (13 February 2012):
 It makes no sense for him to be mad at you when he wasn't there for you during your pregnancy, verbally abusing you, and claiming the child isn't his.
That's something you obviously need to ask him.
You have ever right to be mad at him for cheating on you and being a jackass to you during your pregnancy.
But do you really have a right to be mad about him getting another girl pregnant? No, because you two weren't together. I'm not saying deep down inside you shouldn't be disappointed. But if he was careless enough to get you pregnant (it takes 2) then you shouldn't be the least be surprised he's spreading his seed.
You really need to move on and wash your hands of this guy. He's not daddy material. Not while you were pregnant, so what makes you think he's going to turn over a new leaf?? Let's be honest, he's not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHe is free to get whomever he wants pregnant, BUT why get mad at me for not wanting to be with him when the whole time he was with her. The reason we seperated is because he cheated on me. I couldnt just get back with him after that. and he continues to prove my suspicions right. He didnt even attempt to be patient with me throughout my pregnancy. Yes i had a rough time but he didnt support me at all. Im really hurt.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 February 2012):
 I wouldn't want to date this guy either, he is ACTUALLY blaming YOU for him knocking another girl up?
What a loser, honey.
You and your son can do better.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (13 February 2012):
And you want to get back together with this guy why???
Yeah, I'm not buying he's a sperm donor in this case. She's going to go after him for some financial support for her child. It would be dumb not to.
If you were together while you were pregnant then you have a right to be mad because he was obviously cheating on you behind your back. Sperm donor or not.
HOWEVER, if you two weren't together then you have no right
to be mad. He's free to date, knock up whomever he pleases.
But, I get that you're a bit hurt that he got another girl pregnant. It would be difficult not to.
I can understand you being hurt about his behavior during your pregnancy, but that has nothing to do with the other pregnant girl.
IMO, I don't think you should get back together with this guy. This whole trying to make a complete family is often more trouble than it's worth. It's often less than a happy family, more of an unhappy, fighting family.
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A
female
reader, Deagan +, writes (13 February 2012):
 You should be angry and terribly hurt by this. And no you are not over reacting. He lied to you saying that he was simply a sperm donor and he is blaming you saying that the reason he went astray was because you were being mean, moody and pushing him away while you were pregnant. He doesn't seem very supportive of you.
You can't help that he's the father of your son, so it's best that you simply keep it at that.
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