A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:For the last 4 years, I have been in LDR and we meet after every three months or sometimes six months. Otherwise we keep it going through phone. There is 400 miles distance between us. When recently I visited her, after eight months, she gained so much weight that she was looking Buffalo. Though , she has gained weight in butt and boobs for good reason as they have become very big which I like but for wrong reasons in the face. She is one year older than me and was good looking but fat in the face has spoiled her look a bit. She is , no doubt about it gem of a person, and pampers me like crazy whenever we meet and I also love her. When I met her, three days back, she was having flu and kissed her on lips and nose so that I could also get infected and I did so you can see how much I love her. My question is that is it possible for her not to lose weight from boobs and butt but from her face? And how to tell her that she should lose weight without hurting her? I will be looking forward to you people to help me on this.
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female
reader, Candid Cally  +, writes (7 November 2011):
You need to ask her if she has changed her diet since you two last met. If the weight gain occurred without a change in her diet, caloric intake, or exercise habits it can be a symptom of a medical problem and she needs to see her doctor immediately for blood tests to rule out a hormonal imbalance (frequently, ovarian cysts, or hypothyroidism cause weight gain, very rarely a pituitary gland problem called cushings can cause weight gain especially noticable in the face).
Also, if she is taking certain medications including contraceptives, steroids, anti-depressants, or anti-psychotics...these can cause weight gain. None of these medications should be stopped abruptly and if they may be the cause of her weight gain, she needs to make an appointment with her prescribing physician to discuss the weight gain if she is concerned about this side-effect.
Unfortunately, it is not likely she could just lose the fat in her face and keep the rest where you like it. It is possible, but not very likely. If you do speak to her about her weight gain, you need to find a sensitive and tactful approach. You need to consider whether she may have a medical problem contributing to her weight gain, or if it is simply the result of eating more or exercising less. You should NOT tell her you dislike the way the weight gain has made her face look. This will likely be devastating to her.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (7 November 2011):
 It is possible, sure, it can happen. But it is out of anyones control. Where your body stores fat, and where it will first lose fat, is genetically determined. It might be that if she works out she will keep the fat in her face and lose it on her breasts and bum. Anything can happen, that depends on her body type.
If you want her to lose weight you have to just talk to her about it. She'll have to want it herself, or else nothing will happen. But you can encourage her. The hard part is to talk about it, because people are often sensitive about their weight. But there is no other way than to sit down and have a real talk about it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2011): No I don't think so. Weight gain and weight loss usually happens all over and tends to be pretty balanced. If she lost weight, her boobs and butt would naturally get smaller. However, if she lost weight and became thinner she could keep her small frame and do exercises to make her butt bigger like squats and lunges, stuff like that. But I think it is inappropriate for you to ask her to change her body. I don't think it is going to go over very well and that is a very touchy subject that if brought up may create long lasting insecurities in her, as it would any woman. It's just not something you should ever mention. That has to come from her. If she is happy with herself as she is then that's that. If she would like to change her body that should be her decision and forethought, nobody else's.
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