A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey I have a somewhat odd question to askBasically I'm in a long term relationship and I adore the way my partner smells. I won't go into details but basically it really gets my motor going, and I'm pretty sure many other people must feel a similar way about their partners.But what about other people. Are you allowed to have the same reaction to how another person smells? I've just been camping with a bunch of friends and one of them *Toby, gave me much the same feeling as my partner just by the way he smelled.I get the science behind it all, clearly he's a biologically viable candidate, that's why my body is saying he's the sweetest thing since sugar, but what about socially? Is it concidered a form of cheating? Or just accepted as a natural thing that you can't help?I'd love to know your opinions on the matter as you all seem to be a very diverse community (which is superb to see :-) ) Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2015): Oh,anon! I feel you! Yup,defo NOT the deo,aftershave or perfume.
When a guy has that "sweet" smell that you just described it just drives me nuts! And it is funny because when most people sweat, it smells disgusting or horrible to me,but hey when that guy sweated it smelled goood to me!(for me it's a difference between "salty" and "sweet"-the ones I don't like taste salty, the ones I like taste sweet)
Hell,my own smell doesn't smell good to me,but his did!
Yes,you are right-it only means you are biologically very compatible. It does NOT mean that you will be compatible emotionally etc.
I do not think is cheating, however I think your senses are even more heightened because you didn't get your usual "hit" (I suppose bf was not on the trip with you?). Gosh, not only smell,but taste too!Mother nature realy wanted us to procreate... Kissing him felt like having a choc.arghh! The guy was addictive!
And,yes, there is more than one biological match to you, so I guess it's normal reaction (wouldn't know- never met a guy who smelt like this again,but I sure as hell am looking!)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2015): Well my boyfriend alays smells his best (in this regard anyway) after he's been working hard, logging with his grandad, and I noticed *toby after a particularly exhausting day (we were monstering in larp; running around, hitting people with foam swords) so I think its definitely them rather than their deodorant.
Thanks for your opinions, I was very curious on the matter :-)
Sincerely anon x
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (7 August 2015):
 Cheating is an act. React to a scent, or reacting in any other form or manner, is a reaction, not an action. It's subconscious, not conscious. So it's not cheating. You felt turned on by his smell, you didn't get turned on because you started to grope him. There's a huge difference.
Being turned on, or getting horny, or finding other people attractive, is natural, normal, and acceptable. Insecure people, however, will find any such normal reaction as a sign that they are not good enough. Hence why so many women complain about porn use (for the most part because they are jealous of the women in porn and feel inferior).
Having sexual thoughts about someone else, is not cheating. Starting an affair, meeting in secret, flirting etc, now that crosses the border.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 August 2015): As long as you don't act on it! It's fine :-) have a giggle about it and don't stress.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (7 August 2015):
 Would I consider it cheating that someone's scent is a turn on?
Absolutely not. UNLESS... you go further then just smell, notice and move on. What scents turn you on is not entirely under your control. Same as seeing someone VERY attractive (in your eyes) - you don't go blind or unable to smell because you are in a relationship.
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