A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:We went out for a year and then she broke it off. After about 4 months we started seeing each other. We have been seeing each other for the past 2 months. I am not sure why she broke it off. I am a healthy 65 she is 54. She has never been married. I want to ask her to marry me on Valentines day. I have never stopped loving her. Is this a good Idea? I already bought the ring.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 February 2016):
 Do you feel like this woman genuinely loves you, or is it that you love her and she is stringing you along? Does it sometimes feel like she is using you?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2016): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe refused the ring but did say not ready, maybe, and time will tell. I think she is waiting for something profound from me. I still work with her on a Nonprofit.
I don't know how to change things to the next step
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (28 January 2016):
 At 65 the clock is ticking. You have dated for a year, you know your mind and heart. I'm as worried about the 4 month break as anyone except you, but if you feel comfortable with that, what is waiting going to gain?
Here is my prediction. Asking the question is going to put her under some pressure. She will have to make a commitment, or admit she is just leading you on. You are ready for that conversation. She might not be, but even if she asks for time to think about it, you will have taken a step forward in the relationship.
As to whether to do it on Valentines or just on a Date night, well I'm not the romantic calendar watching type. If you think she will treasure the memory of a Feb 14th proposal, go for it.
FA
PS using my Screen name seems silly with a person who is just a bit younger than my Dad (72)
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (28 January 2016):
 A bit premature and I think you might overwhelm her or scare her off by making a big 'Valentine's Day' production out of it.
What were her reasons for breaking it off?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2016): After four months, how, did you get back together, did she call you, or did you, during those four months did you keep in contact, does she ever say she loves you, could she of broken up with you, for another guy, an he dump her, so now she came back crying to you,, am sorry am asking these questions, but you need to know, before you ask her to be your wife, she might be using you, to get over another guy, its been done to me, I didn't fined out till it was to late, but if you two love each other, I hope it works out fabulous, good luck
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2016): After four months, how, did you get back together, did she call you, or did you, during those four months did you keep in contact, does she ever say she loves you, could she of broken up with you, for another guy, an he dump her, so now she came back crying to you,, am sorry am asking these questions, but you need to know, before you ask her to be your wife, she might be using you, to get over another guy, its been done to me, I didn't fined out till it was to late, but if you two love each other, I hope it works out fabulous, good luck
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (27 January 2016):
It is a lovely gesture, but I think you should find out from her why she left you, she obviously had her reasons, and they could be very important to your relationship now, so before thinking of proposing you should sit down with her crack open a bottle of wine and have a heart to heart!
Try and test out the vibes that is coming from her, its obvious you love her, but she might not feel so strongly back, so you need to find out first and be sure that she would say yes before you ask, good luck.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 January 2016):
 You've only been dating two months... I think a proposal is premature and i think that Valentine's day is also not a great idea.
you two took a 4 month break... but never discussed WHY she needed a break... you need to discuss that too.
IN addition at 54 she may be very happy living alone and not being responsible for another human being.
I strongly urge you not to propose until you have talked over the elephant in the living room.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 January 2016):
 I think proposing is a bit premature.
Without know why she broke it off I think I would sort THAT out first.
What's the rush?
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