A
female
age
41-50,
*esika
writes:Ok, the days are a little mixed, cuz this was written a while ago to my cousin, lol.I've known this guy for a year and 5 months, well, a year ago he stopped hanging out with his group of friends so I haven't heard from him, well one sat he showed up out of the blue and when he saw me he gave me a hug and we hung out for the rest of the night. We went to my place and everything was great, then we started to have sex... Then after he wanted to cuddle, just so you know, I NEVER initiated the cuddling. He would hold me while watching TV, he made me use his shoulder as a pillow, and we talked for at least 5 hours, (till 7 am) and he spent the night holding me. The next day he hung out, we talked for awhile, then he had to go to a game he's in. We exchanged #'s, and when he went to leave he kissed me. (FYI: He wasn't able to cum cuz he drank too much) I didn't hear from him until tues. Night, we texted each other, and then he came over to watch a movie. We got hot and heavy, but before anything serious could happen, we had the talk on where this was going. I knew from his friends that he had just gotten outta 5 year relationship, and he mentioned that, and that he doesn't want to rush into another one so quickly, but he said that he does like me a lot, mentioned that we had a lot in common, thinks I'm beautiful, and he mentioned throughout the night, the things he likes about me, and a relationship isn't outta the question, he just wants to take it slow, just have fun for a while and see how it goes. I was fine with that, and happy that I knew where we stand. We had sex again, and yes, we cuddled, and kissed, before, during and after, and again, he wasn't able to cum. I really like him, and want this to turn into a relationship. I didn't feel like this before our sex, but the dumb head cuddled with me and woke up a need in me. :). Then on Wed he texted me about movies, and called me, we talked about movies and stuff, and the entire time he kept stumbling on words, maybe shy? And about 15 mins later I was at the store and he called, instead of cashing out, I went outside so I could hear him, and he says, "Who turned off the music?" I didn't know what he was talking about, but he thought the noise in the store was music, and some guy turned it off, like I was at home with some guy, then when I went to the side of the store he heard dogs barking and asked whose dogs, (in a way that made him sound upset) I didn't know, cuz it was the person who lived behind the store's dog. Is it my imagination, or is he getting jealous? I personally think that he wants me as a gf, but doesn't know it yet, or thinks it's best that he waits. He is coming over on Fri, and he's bringing movies for me to borrow. He really wants me to watch a lot of movies. One time he came over on sunday, we had sex, I started my period so we couldn't ne more, but he ended up staying for another day and a half anyways, and we talked and hung out. One time we hung out, we were watching the VMA's, and he looked at me and said, "I love you" I said, "What?" Then he said, "I mean, I love Eminem." My friends say that he did that to see how I would respond, and when I didn't respond the way he wanted, then he changed it. Last time I saw him, (Like I said, days are mixed up) he stayed at my place for 4 days, he cooked for me, cleaned, had friends over, it was nice, we even took a walk around the park. But I haven't seen him since, and that was 2 weeks ago, and he hardly txts anymore. He txtd me sat night, but I was out with friends, I went to a hockey game he reffed last night cuz my friend was in the game, we chatted for a little bit, but nothing serious, I textd him later to see if he was alright cuz I saw him break up a lot of fights. He texted back, but it was usually just, "k" or "Yep" Longest txt last night was when he told me his phone was gonna die, but that was his 2nd txt, not last one. I don't know what to do. He is pulling away, but I don't know why, how do I get his interest back? Oh, and the last day we talked we were chatting and I mentioned I've never been on a date, he was amazed and I asked if he would be my first, he said it would be cool. Did that scare him? Do I ignore him? What do I do? I really like him, I might even love him.
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (12 October 2010):
 Well i hope for your sake he does show up. I understand he has a lot of problems at the minute alcolism is quite hard to beat but he sounds like he is on the right track and i wish you both all the best in the future.
A
female
reader, gesika +, writes (12 October 2010):
gesika is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you aunt honesty, Well, he called me last night, asked if he could come over and hang out, I said sure, two hours later he still wasn't there, I called him twice, but no answer. I was pretty upset, and had a friend come over to console me, lol. Well at 2 a.m. he calls me, and apologizes because his mom was afraid he was going out drinking, so she wouldn't let him leave, and he fell asleep. (he lives with his mom cuz he gave the place to his ex, and yes, he has a drinking prob, but I'm willing to deal with that) I barely spoke to him, let him talk, and I think the silence showed that I was angry, and he apologized, but it was the last straw with me. I asked him why he went two weeks without talking to me, and he apologized for that too, said his family and him were working out his alcoholism, and that he was distancing himself from all his friends, not just me. I got him to apologize alot last night. :) Well, we chatted for two hours, and it was good. This week he's taking me to a park to go bike riding, (He's gonna let me borrow his mom's bike) and he's hanging out this weekend. I said, "Yeah, you say this now, but a couple weeks later with no word from you..." He said that would never happen again. Also a brother of a friend of his has a HUGE crush on me, and wont leave me alone, seriously, it's getting creepy, buying me stuff, driving past my house late at night, etc... I told this to my guy, and he freaked out, he told me that that guy is bad news, beats his gfs, and stalks. He got so worried that he tried to come over last night to keep me safe, and then today while I was outside, I saw his friend drive by my house very slowly, making sure I was safe. Also, I asked him if I scared him off, he said def not. He's gonna cook for me! He's an amazing cook. Now all I have to worry about is if he's acctually going to show or call. Hmmmmm.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (12 October 2010):
Ok well it definetaly sounds like this guy really likes you so dont worry about that because am quite positive that he does. but with him coming out of a 5 year relationship his head is probably all over the place and i just hope for your sake he is not on the rebound, i totally understand were he was coming from with not wanting to rush in to anything because he needs some time after his last relationship to sort his head out. Ok so he said he loved you and now it seems he is being very distant towards you make your reaction scared him a little and he is really embarresed now and is trying to distance himself away from you, maybe he didnt expect to feel like this with another girl so soon and he is a little bit scared and just needs time to get his head together. Or maybe he didnt mean to say i love you and its worrying him that he doesnt know how he is feeling. Am quite sure that you never scared him away that he done that himself, so just keep in contact with him and try not to be to pushy give him a little time, remind him though that you like him and want to spend some time together.
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