A
female
age
36-40,
*olkadotmanda
writes:Okay, well instead of writing out the long version, I'll just give the important details... There is this guy that I work with, and I like him, and I am almost sure that he likes me, in fact he told my friend that he would go out with me....well we've been out in a casual group a couple of times, and he was very flirty with me. But at work, sometimes he doesn't even talk to me. Every once in a while, he will joke around with me and flirt. But we really don't talk much, but there are times when we are alone and we could talk, but he doesn't really say much. I've been told he is shy, and that is the impression that most people get from him, but I know that there is another side of him that is quite talkative and flirty. I don't know if he just doesn't want people at work knowing about his personal life or starting rumors. But its becoming so confusing, at times I am 100% sure that he likes me, I often catch him staring at me, and he smiles when he sees me, but then he won't say anything to for days, and Its really frustrating, because I don't know what to do! any advice would be appreciated!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2009): If he's not talking to you for days, then doesn't that mean you're also not talking to him for days? Maybe he's sitting there wondering whether or not you're into him.
Shy people can have "on" moments (and extroverts can sometimes be insular), so I wouldn't read too much into that -- we're all dynamic people and sometimes we're good at flirting, sometimes we can't think of anything to say, and sometimes we say the stupidest thing possible.
Just try to be open and friendly (and flirty, though maybe not too much depending upon your work situation) when you do see him, and eventually get the conversation to the point where the two of you can find an excuse to hang out together outside of work.
Try not to worry too much about if he is or isn't into you; just be open to it happening and don't let the worrying prevent you from talking to somebody you'd normally love to talk to.
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