Is he just afraid of committment or does he only want sex?

Ok so I've gotten into a real mess recently because I've fallen in love with my ex boyfriends best friend. We have been friends for over four years, and about 8 months ago finally took our friendship to the next level after I had broken up with my boyfriend. I had liked him for so long, and I guess had always hoped he liked me to. He is in the Army and is currently deployed in Iraq until September. He tells me how much he misses me and how much he is thinking of me. He always tries to call and write me as much as possible, but we are not dating exclusivly. So I have been confused whether he wants me to wait on him or to just move on. So finally I wrote him and asked if it was ok if I started dating other guys. He wrote me back in an angry sort of way saying that I could do whatever I wanted and that I shouldn't feel guilty. Then he again wrote me appologizing saying that he didn't mean to be angry he was just going through a lot, but that if I met someone I should not hold back because of him. But I was confused so I wrote him telling him that if he wanted to be with me I would wait for him and that he was the only guy I wanted, but that I could not put my life on hold for someone who didn't feel the same way. Finally he wrote me back saying that he cared about me alot, but that we could not be together because of his friend (my ex). I am hurt and angry at him because I don't see how its ok for us to be sneaking around behind his back having sex, but dating would not be ok. I know they are friends, but if you love and care about someone, shouldn't you find a way to make it work? Is he just afraid of committment or does he only want sex? We have been friends for years and I knew that he was kind of a player before we got together, but since me and him starting our "affair" he acts like I'm the only one he wants and the one he wants to see. He even told me he wants me to pick him up from the airport because I'm the first person he wants to see when he gets home. Sorry its long, but I'm really confused about his intentions...

View related questions: best friend, move on, my ex, player

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