A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupid funs, I have a situation that i really need help with. Here it is (sorry if it is long):I am 22 years old, closeted and straight-acting gay (its not really an act, as it is how I seem to be and i like to be, i really dont like femine-like gays). I don't want to come out of the closet because of my family beliefs and the area I live, so NOONE knows I am gay.Ok the situation now is I met a guy in university 2 years ago, and I tried with all my power to get to know him since I liked him from the first time I saw him. We got really well and soon became friends. 2 years later now, I dont know if he is straight or gay or bi, since his past or his personal sexual life is never brought up to for talking, I never saw him with a girl, nor with a guy, and I did not see him pursue something with a girl from what I know. I meet with him every day. Well soon I started to fall for him. So naturally I became touching him. Put my arm around his back (like friends do), or tickle him when we were alone, or tease him and so on. He was accepting of all this. Later on I sometimes touched his hair unconsciously as we would watch a movie, but as soon as i realized what i was doing I would pull my hand. He had no reaction though whatsoever, and i think a true straight guy would be "what the fcuk!?". Anyway, at class i would touch his leg (at knee) and he is always cool. I send him text msgs with hints all over I like him, smiley faces, everything, and he corresponds always immediately, puting smiley faces and so on. And so on.I am really confused, he looks straight, flawless, and nothing to hint he is gay. Though he "lets" me do all that stuff without even trying to tell me NOT TO. Oh, and the thing I realized a few weeks now is that when our men friends see a pretty woman passing by or at tv, or movies and comment, I dont commend since I am not interested (noone knows i am gay though) but nor my FRIEND comments. So what is your oppinion? Gay? Gay and not interested in me? Bi? Straight? :/ I really am stumbled upon a rock here... The hard thing is that I am always falling for straight men and that is what I fear...Thanks for your answers in advance, looking forward to reading them :)A closeted-straight-acting-gay-confused man :)( I choose UK for a country, though I am not from there, so that in case someone see this cant make a connection :) )
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male
reader, Jonnyt +, writes (26 February 2012):
Hi,
All the signs suggest that' he is gay also. Most straight guys wouldn't have you doing them things and say nothing. Also, if you tell him you are gay he should be v understanding and if he isn't he wasn't as good of a friend as out thought. I didn't have a boyfriend until I was 29 and was afraid of telling family etc as they are religious etc though they have been great. We have been together 3 years now.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2012): I am the one that wrote the story (dont know how to proper reply as me :P)
Well actually one time i let my head lean on his shoulder. And ofcourse he didnt response and I said ok enough I will stop. The next minute though when i moved away my head, he did the same to me.
Btw when i say i do tease him or tickle him , he does the same back though not the hand on the back.
Anyway, thanks for your answers so far, i would love to see more coming.. thanks!
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A
male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (25 February 2012):
 sounds like he's not giving you any response negative OR positive. is men friends touching normal in your culture? it has to be asked...
sounds like he is letting you invade his personal space and he's happy with it but what i'm NOT hearing is him doing it to you back which to me would be the positive signal you are looking for. as such i cannot say one way or the other and i've been in this situation loads of times myself.
good luck
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