A
male
age
36-40,
*illMe
writes:Hi again,I just would like to ask the pros and cons of having an ex girlfriend as a "friend", like hang out, do stuff with them, I was wondrin if its a safe move to get her back or will i be risking frustration if ever i see her dating another guy and im just like her hang out buddy. Thanks!Carl
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 March 2012): I am not really for being friends with an ex. I fully trusted my second girlfriend, to tell me if there was anything wrong, in the relationship. She never did, so, I continued my faulty things. And, one day, out of the blue, she drops me. She gave me a really dumb reason (Which I won't repeat) for the breakup.I eventually caught onto the fact she was lying to me. She then eventually confessed to all the things she didn't like. However, by the time I had found out, it was WAY too late. It was already a few days after she had broken my heart. Then, I had to get one last bit of info. And, what I had learned from my last question from her was so bad, I had to make her feel the way I had felt. So, I stopped the friendship with her. I figured it was fair. Not sure if I did the right thing.
A
male
reader, KillMe +, writes (26 March 2012):
KillMe is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks! i guess we shouldn't be friends at all, it'll just renew anguish, and i think i should also learn that life isn't always fair.
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A
female
reader, AuntieRI-RI  +, writes (25 March 2012):
Okay, so the problem with Ex's being friends with you too soon is you miss them, actually all you miss is the feeling o being around them. But you can't just go from Intimate lovers to Friends, not how it works sadly enough. I say this because I found it out the hard way, through a lot of pain and anger and frustration. He and I kept falling back into eachother's arms and it just lead into a whole new world of pain and being fucked over. Sometimes it's best to just wait, or watch how things go at least. - Erina 3
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A
female
reader, supermum +, writes (25 March 2012):
 It depends. Are you completely over eachother? Until you are, I would warn against it. It is always good to end on good terms where you can, and you can let her know you are always there for her if she needs it.If you do decide to go ahead and be friends, you need to set some ground rules. They are an ex for a reason, so future relationships should be out of the question. (That is a personal opinion, I would never get back with an ex). It is important that there is no drunken kisses, no having giggle fits and getting too close, no getting into bed. Doing any of that would only spoil the friendship. And if and when they do get a new partner, it would be polite to slowely phase out. Most people do not like their partners hanging out with their exes ;)Hope that helps? And good luck!
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