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Internet chat room problems...

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Question - (20 July 2009) 5 Answers - (Newest, 24 May 2012)
A male Ireland age 41-50, anonymous writes:

If your partner has had the habit of going into internet chatrooms for say 3 years. Always denying it knowing that you know, telephone numbers found, conversations seen what said want a naughty pic, asked if they liked. Texting guys and giving phone number. Panic when phone rings. Always convinced i`m paranoid but somewhere out of the blue it popped back up by accident. Anger when asked. Same thing again and again. So fed up with chat and dating sites, i was begging for a personal ad to add a different flavour.

First of all it was me who wasnt talking enough, things go alright and yet again denial. After years now i permanently go, denial turns into i`m sorry, never meant to hurt you and i`ve learned this time. Could a person really mean they are sorry, or will they hide it better? If it's harmless why hide it?

View related questions: chat room, text

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A female reader, So_Very_Confused United States +, writes (24 May 2012):

So_Very_Confused agony auntpeople hide things they know are wrong.

if it's been going on for three years and lying is occurring it's probably time to leave the relationship.

the lies undermine any trust you could build.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 May 2012):

Got the same problem with my partner, it's being going on for years. He says he'll stop but just hides it better or tries to. He gets very angry and makes out that i'm the one with the problem but why would he hide it if he's not doing anything wrong. It is putting a strain on the relationship cos he's constantly sneaking off to chat and thinking I don't know what he's up to.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (21 July 2009):

I think i would get away and stay away if i was you.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009):

Quite a lot on this subject lately. If she`s hiding it then its because she`s doing something she wouldnt want you to do. In other words finding out is likely spell its over. After 3 years its unlikely to stop. She will hide it better and also be secure knowing she can just talk her way out of it. Its true old habits die hard.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009):

from experience people tend to hide things not because of fear or the outcome but to protect others from hurt

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