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In a long distance relationship at the moment but I want sex

Tagged as: Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 May 2015) 3 Answers - (Newest, 31 May 2015)
A female United States age 30-35, anonymous writes:

My boyfriend had been away for about 8 months now . He went of to study in Wyoming and I am in Illinois. I have been going through allot without him and I am having a really hard time being faithful. In a relationship I am always a hot head. I always need to be having some type of action sexually. He has not been the best at this long distance relationship. He doesn't message me or call me add much add he should. I should mention that he fires message me though. He seems to b too chilled about all this. Before he left we had been together for a year. I'd it wrong of me to want to have sex with someone else and actually do it with someone else until he is back?

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A male reader, C. Grant Canada +, writes (31 May 2015):

C. Grant agony auntThe person you should be asking is your bf. If he's OK with an open relationship then it's not wrong for you to scratch your itch. If he does have a problem with it, then you two have different ideas about what a relationship should be, and it's time to call it a day. It's not cheating if you have permission, but as Honeypie said, it's never OK to cheat.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (31 May 2015):

Honeypie agony auntIs it wrong? Yes. If you WANT sex with someone else, have the DECENCY to BREAK up with your BF FIRST.

If you can't DO long distance then DON'T.

Whether you are a hot head or "NEED" sexual action, facts are you are IN a relationship. If you aren't getting FROM your relationship what you NEED/WANT - talk to your BF. If you two can't find a way to fix it, then break up, be single a while. See other guys, what not... BUT cheating on a partner IS never OK. It should NEVER be the solution.

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A male reader, Garbo United States +, writes (31 May 2015):

Garbo agony auntOf course it is very wrong! If you want to keep your man then you want to keep sex with him only. Having sex with others will definitively not keep him, nor will you likely stay with him with all that mental memorabilia about sex with others even if he never finds out. From my own experience, less sex we have with random folks more passionate and lasting it is with the one you love.

Having said that, and noting your young age, looks like your young guy is rather inexperienced at paying attention to his girl. I think you should find ways to tell him, that any woman and you included, requires attention if she is to keep her attachment to the guy. That's just how women are biologically and if he gets that then find ways so that you two can meet up so that physical desires get cleared.

Lot of men get caught up in achieving things, forgetting that before asking your woman to sacrafice for the goal, the man needs to keep the girl's attachment by paying attention, so that she is loyal, so that sacrifice can happen. Just sharing the chain that bonds a woman to a man so you can explain it to your guy.

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