A
male
age
30-35,
*-xx
writes:My partner and i broke up around two weeks ago now we caught up last night, so i could grab a few things i left when i moved out as we lived together for 8months. We discussed getting back together he said his heart says yes but his head says no he doesnt want to because his parents wont approve of it mind you he is 26. I said we can try he is scared that ill prove him wrong and he'll want to be with me and his parents arent approving as some nasty things got said one night and they now hate me.anyways so he had told me he missed me and started to get teary when i said it hurts to think you can cut me off and move on with your life after eight months of living together.. he said i do miss you i miss coming home to you everyday i miss waking up to you i miss talking to you everyday i just miss you and started to get teary, i had then said can we try and he said i cant my head says no. he said he still has feelings for me but he cant. so they i grabbed his hand he just froze then looked at me and cuddled me, then he started kissing me and i said we shouldnt be doing this he said it feels so right. then we went up to the bedroom and laid on the bed and cuddled and i said dont you miss being able to do this, he said he does miss it a lot. then one thing lead to another and we had sex, after that he said that was amazing and if our relationship was just about sex we would be the perfect couple.. we then had a shower and my tooth brush which i left two weeks ago was still in there i asked if i could use it or had he used it to clean and he said nah its still there for you.. then i went outside to leave and we cuddled and he said we'll leave this on a good note and wait and see what happens with us i said do you think we have a chance and he said he couldnt answer it. I then messaged him this morning saying i think we should hang out how we did last night, but minus talking about us. can we do that once a week? or am i not good enought to deserve that from you? he replied so what your saying is you want to come around once a week so we can fuck? no strings attached? i was like are you trying to be rude about this? no i want to catch up once a week, and be friends you cant tell me you didnt feel anything last night, just because of what everyone has said and what your head thinkgs i dont believe you feel nothing for me.. as much as youd like to feel nothing, and i dont mind us having sex. he said i dont know if its such a good idea? i wrote back why? because you felt something last night? but you dont want to disappoint anyone so you just dont want your feelings to get involved? he said thats right, i dont want to get my feelings involved it hurt to much and im not willing to do it again to myself. i dont want to take that risk.. i then replied risk what? it hurt yes i know it did.. but i believe we are something just give us a shot if we work we can sort something out, as i said last night im not throwing this away we were amazing!! and i know you felt something so stop being stubborn.. give it a shot without anyone knowing then if were not going anywhere we can be nothing before you reply dont try being mean and say hurtful things. you have a big heart so listen to it!! i still havent got a reply!!however i said last night we can try and if we dont work we'll cut each other and forget each other and he said he didnt want to cut each other off.Im sick of people telling me to move on!! i want what we used to have.. I just need advice!!!
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broke up, kissing, move on, moved out Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, p-xx +, writes (10 February 2011):
p-xx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell no we used to fight because of the way they used to talk about me then one day he had enough of the fighting! i seen him again last night i turned up there which i wont do again.. he doesnt want to talk about feelings at the moment he isnt willing to move into the relationship again so were going to be friends talk over the phone and catch up once a week then in three weeks im staying there for one or two nights i believe if i dont talk about feelings and just be nice and we have fun then he will give us a shot i just need to give him time.. and we are happy when we dont discuss feelings!!
it may take a couple of months but if i catch up with him and we might see each other more he might develope stronger feelings and not care about his parents.
were really good friends and can discuss anything he just gets angry talking about feelings as he isnt ready to give us ago yet :/
A
female
reader, Tigerlily  +, writes (10 February 2011):
Are there any other problems here between you besides his parents won't approve? Why did you break up? I think you two need to do the opposite of what you suggested. Get together, skip the sex, and talk through your issues.
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