A
male
age
41-50,
*chirall
writes:Hey guys,I've been reading some very good advice on this forum. The posters here are very cool and helpful.If I can ever help I promise to, but right now, I'm afraid it is me who is going nuts.Let me start by saying, I think I'm crazy for going nuts over women, as most of us do( yes, men too). But when your mind gets hold of you and creates emotion, it is so freakin powerful!! isn't it? lolOK, here's my thing, please stay awake, I'll be fast.(My dates are foggy as is my entire head over the last few years) ANYWAYA few years ago, right after I find out my fiance of 6+ years was sleeping with someone and trying to no avail to "work it out" lol a gorgeous girl moves in next door to my one bedroom. She was with her BF of a few years and I had my cheating girl over often, but quickly, we talked, ditched our partners and became an item.We fell madly in love. I never felt this much for someone in such a short time and I felt it was reciprocated. She was almost "overbearing" after a while.Fastforwarding, our 2 1/2 year relationship was somewhat bumpy, mostly me making stupid mistakes or getting caught in white lies, never cheating, but we moved in together,(you know how that can be) and we had an age difference, I was 32, she was 20. It only mattered sometimes, but it did matter.Finally, a situation had her move to SC with her mom, we visited often during that 5-6 month time and were passionate all the time, then I was planning to move to SC and be her mother's protege,so to speak, she had her own recruiting company.I was so excited, on the way up, i got into an accident and shattered my kneecap.Her mother decided it was best i go back to FL and get better, crying, we left each other. I was a 32 year old, but I was mamed, so I felt like a helpless boy literally crying! lolWe talked on the phone and I actually was the one who became annoyed with the long distance thing. I didn't want to talk, i missed her calls or kept it short, meanwhile she was ALWAYS calling.Eventually, of course, during our last meeting, which we had sex and everything, I found she was with someone else. She finally claimed she loved him and I had to live with the fact that I was lying with a full leg cast on a twin bed in my mother's house, while my baby was living with some new guy, she loved.I was suicidal. I thought about ALL the mistakes i made. EVERYTHING, every little lie, the car accident,the phone calls. I pouned myself to death with these thoughts.I did the NC (no contact) thing as painful as it was and she ALWAYS calls, after a couple months or something, but it usually starts out nice and ends with her ripping me up again. It's like a game. It's like everytime I get a nice hard scab she comes and rips it off.Now I have a long distance relationship(which was created by hospice needing Grandparents who both passed in the last two months.We have been "together", mostly phone for 6 months, and now you would think logically it's the time for us to be together.She is wonderful, the best, my age(well -4), so sweet, no psychological games, gorgeous, everything you would want. If I put the two case studies togethr it would be hands down my current girl.BUT I LOVE MY EX! and she just called recently and did it again. I want this magic conversation where she tells me she still loves me...blah blah blah and I always get right there and end up with something, she is torturing me.But I'll never love a girl like that, I think my current may prove that, she's awesome, but doesn't hold a candle.Sorry if it was too long.
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fiance, long distance, moved in, my ex Reply to this Question
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male
reader, schirall +, writes (23 February 2009):
schirall is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI know what i know, just wish i didn't feel what i felt.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 February 2009): if you want a disfunctional relationship then keep pining for the ex-girlfriend. you have a great woman now and if you let her go it will be a mistake. but if you have to let her go because your not over your ex then do it now before it gets more serious. life if full of choices. dont expect your girlfriend to take you back very easily or trusting to you.
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A
male
reader, life101 +, writes (23 February 2009):
Idk how to ask questions on this thing so if you could hook me up on that it would be wonderful BUT
i had the same problem man where i love me ex not the distance but loving your ex and wat you need to do is calm yourself down and stop trying to get to another point with her and be with this girl you been talking too i promise it seems like theres no fucking tommorrow but it gets better once you let go theres some quote or something says "tis better to be loved than not loved at all" and think about this once a cheater always a cheater so if you guys did get back together your just going back to more heartbreak man so look and move forward not back..
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