A
female
age
41-50,
*anadianMom
writes:I am living in an unhappy marriage. We have been married for 10 years and have a beautiful little boy, who was born just before we got married. I guess my unhappiness began a couple of years after we got married. I was finishing school and he was working all the time. He works nights and doesn't come home until after midnight each night. I work days, so our schedules are completely opposite. I have felt like a single mom my whole relationship. I have done everything for my son, including taking him on trips, school activities, etc. My husband is 11 years older than me. We don't sleep in the same room anymore, and we have more of a roommate situation. For many years I have been asking for intimacy, love and sex. I am very honest with him, but it has turned into nagging. After continual nagging, he finally will have sex with me, but it is angry sex and I end up crying. I have changed because I have a great career, great friends and am involved in many activities, all of which don't include him. We are not interested in the same things. I have asked him for us to go for help, but he says that its me who needs to go. I feel very lost because my son is out playing with his friends, my husband is never home and I am always left alone. To be honest, I don't love him anymore and am beginning to resent him. He tells me he loves me, but actions speak louder than words. What do I do?
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male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (18 July 2010):
 Leave the dush
A
female
reader, CanadianMom +, writes (18 July 2010):
CanadianMom is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI certainly do maintain myself. I am an avid road cyclist, practice yoga 2 times a week and play soccer in our cities womens' league. I am in better shape now than I was when I was 20. He however, has no interests in maintaining and has let himself go. He even started dressing different, almost like an old man. I even have bought sexy outfits and toys to spark an interest, but he just turns the other way.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (17 July 2010):
 Tell him how you feel.
I think it's one of those times where you will have to sit down and figure out what YOU want and then go for it.
Is there any way he can get a change in work hours? Work days instead or at least get some day, some night?
If you don't feel like you love him, who drag it out?
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (17 July 2010):
tell hm exactly what you wrote in here..... then leave for a few weeks then send him a letter telling him you want a divorce... post marked from paris.... really dont see the problem hes a little older maybe his sex drive has gone down...
Or maybe he has some one on the side.. i think you should do an investigation... and dont just ask him he will lie and start covering his tracks... just keep your eyes peeled for anything suspicious....
another thing do you maintain your self you should have lost the baby fat by now... im just sayng you cant expect a guy to want to be imtament with shamu
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