A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:okay so I really like these two girls both have great personalities and both seem to like me so here is a little info about them. girl 1: we've know each other for 2-3 years. i asked her out when we first met and she said she wasent interested in anything serious. more recently she has been very kind to me and helped me with several personal issues thru email. we talk regularlyand she is always in a good mood it seems.but shes a flake and a party girl. recently i asked her to the movies.she said she didn't want anything serious or anything in her life rightnow and i explained i just wanted to date also, and she seemed to agree to a date next wee, ill have to talk to her about itto be sure it's not just some friends hang in out thing .but, she lives like 45 minutes away, andcantcome see me :( i have to borrow the family car to go see her.girl 2 Is the one and only girl I ever dated past one date. we dated for a month. but she was always very busy with school and work and we split. She said she would come to visit me,but never did.but we kept in contact all the time. however when i asked her recently if she would like to maybe date again. but she said she was seeing someone,but itwasent a boyfriend yet. she gave me her new number and said that we should plan a time to hang out soon... we've been texting back and forth since. and she agreed to diner and a movie with me to, but no exact dater time yet... just when her schedule frees up. I like her alot, and we have a lot in common, but shes always so busy.but she said she would come to see me... a 50 minute drive for heragain, i don't have a car of my own right now so im trying to figure out which one to pursue, Obviously only know all the details of my relationship with both these girls...AND IM NOT ASKING YOU TO PICK FOR ME.Ive just never dealt with a situation like this, what are some questions i should be asking my self? what should I be looking at or for that I could be missing here? thanks guys for taking the time to read this.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 May 2011):
 @lysha
there is a big huge difference between telling someone you are NOT seeing others and doing it behind their back and being UPFRONT and telling them that you are NOT ready to settle down and make a commitment to someone.
I mean after all, UNTIL you don't need to ASK who to choose you really aren't ready to make a commitment are you???
A
female
reader, lysha  +, writes (27 May 2011):
 and no offence, but do not ever date two people at once, you will then be consider as a cheater or a user to people and noone will ever be interested, :), plus if you like them both then you dont wanna hurt or upset them by playing with their feelings:)
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you lysha and very confused...will consider everything that was said here. it has been very helpful.and to answer very confused's question,i'm not sure how to date 2girls at once, and i know that sooner or later i'll have to pick one of them eventually:(
...............................
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 May 2011):
is there a reason you can't date both?
...............................
A
female
reader, lysha +, writes (26 May 2011):
right, so girl one, you have known for 2-3 years right?so you may want to think about your friendship?you have known eachother quite long to gather a strong friendship so maybe the friendship has gotten so strong that your now in the 'friend zone' and you wouldnt want to ruin a great friendship? so you need to think on that carefully!you also need to think on everything she has said to you, she has said a few times you doesnt want anything serious, ithink she may just want you as a friend but doesnt know how to tell you, so think about that and try to think about a way to talk to her to see what she wants wether maybe its a reltionship or just a friendship, and if she chooses friendship dont be too let down, just accept it and be grateful that you have such a great friend :)girl 2 - you need to think about the distance, and wether people will be happy to keep driving you their and wether you and this girl will be able to cope with not seeing eachother that much, yes she does seem to like you, but you need to think about how much spare time she has because you will barely see her as it is so if she doesnt have too much free time then this will get in the way of your relationship, think about ways you could work around this like maybe staying close friends for a few years and when old enough to make your own way their make ago of things:)just make sure you think of both girls feelings and your own)hope this has helped:)
...............................
|
