A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:I need some help!I'm a 37 year old man who has only had one relationship which only lasted about a year about 10 years ago. This is due to low self confidence, also as I got older, it was harder to start a relationship.Last year, I met this South African girl (about 24 yrs old) who's here on a visitor visa. She joined the choir group that I'm a member of. After a couple of weeks of flirting, I asked her out for a drink.When we went for the drink, we spent 3-4 hours talking about everything, our families, lives. We also talked about past relationships, she said that she's never had a boyfriend. When I dropped her off at her host family's house, I don't try to kiss her.Due to her having to work (she was an au pair for her host family and she worked in a shop), we didn't go out on a date for a while. However, we did go round to a couple of friends from the choir when they had parties. Two of my friends from the choir who knew about our 'date' both told me that they thought, by her body language, the fact that she only go out to the parties if I was going, she'd only really talk to me at choir and not anyone else, that she felt the same way about me as I felt about her. After a month or so, we went out for the day to a local tourist venue. I had decided, in the light of what my friends had said (by the way, I trust my friends opinions) that I'd try and move our 'relationship' on by trying to hand her hand as we walked around. Although the day started will, towards the end of the day, when I still hadn't held her hand, I felt that it was going badly. Again, I dropped her off at home, I didn't try to kiss her but said that I see her at choir. A couple of weeks later, she told me that she'd been offered (and accepted) an au pair job in Scotland for a couple of months. And that she was leaving the following day. I knew that she'd been for the interview. (I also know that the job was real). That was the last I heard from her until a couple of days ago when she send me a Facebook invite to her new choir's concert. I know that she went though and selected to send the invite as she's also a Facebook friends with one of my friend's from my choir and hasn't received an invite. My problem is, I am still in love with her and have been since she left. I went onto her profile, all of these feelings just came flooding back. My question is, should I go to the concert. Should I tell her how I feel? As I said, I am still so much in love with her and now can't stop thinking about her!Please help me!!
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confidence, facebook, flirt, never had a boyfriend Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MissB23 +, writes (23 November 2009):
You both sound lovely !.I wish you the best of luck !.Please let us know how this goes !.
A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (15 October 2009):
 Ok then, thats great. Feel free to send me a private message with an update x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 October 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice Boo22, I'll be sure to let you know!
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A
female
reader, boo22 +, writes (14 October 2009):
Please go to the concert!!!!! Go and see her and talk to her.
You only regret the things in life you DONT do. You'll be kicking yourself for ages if you don't.
Shes probably thinking you only like her as a friend or something. I bet everything will turn out golden.
Go gor it!! Let us know what happens. How exciting is this. good luck x
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