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female
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*ergie
writes: im guilty of two timing! ive been dating my first bf for almost 8 months now. he's serving the country so he's always busy but i love him for who he is. he's funny and lovable. but he can get kinda sticky at times. u know, like talking on the phone every night, calling me every now and then. i know it shows that he cares and that he thinks about me all the time but it kinda gets annoying at times and i just cant get myself to tell him off cuz im afraid it might hurt his feelings!so around 6 months thru our relationship, i got to know this other guy and without even thinking, we were dating each other. i dont even know why i went out with him in the first place, since im already attached to a guy i love so much. It was like an infatuation which eventually developed into love. now he really loves me a lot. my parents know about both of them, they know my parents, i know their parents and they know about each other. they want me to make a decision now. i dont know who i should choose. i dont want to hurt either of them but i know ive hurt them bad enough already. i cant bear the thought of losing both of them, or either of them. i seriously need help. what should i do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (10 April 2007):
 What should you do? My advice is to date no-one and leave both of them well alone until you have sorted your own mind out. If you were that into your 1st BF you wouldn't cheat on him and if you were that into no.2 you would have dumped no.1 and be contented. You are not 100% happy with either so why settle for half-measures? If you choose one and then you become unhappy with the relationship you will forever wonder what would have happened had you picked the other. The braver and stronger thing to do is call it quits, have some me time and work out what you really want.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (10 April 2007):
 Well you have to choose one I guess if that's what they want, make a list of the characteristics you love about each of them. Then go with your heart. You possibly don't love them both as much as you think or you wouldn't be two-timing. If you truly love someone you can't even conceive of being with someone else.
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