A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need help overcoming my fear of relationships. And basically get out of my shell. To get to the point: I have never had a boyfriend. And at 24, that's pretty late. When I was younger I was happy that I wasn't involved with all the drama. No pregnancy scares, no STD's, no messy romance. But these days I'm more and more wondering what it's like to be in love and loved by another person. Still, whenever I meet guys I keep them at arm's length. I make excuses for myself every time. - I'm too busy making a career for myself- He might be turned off by my virgin status- I have no experience sexually- I have no experience mentally, which means I can't separate the genuine good guys from the unsuitable ones. I mean, how do I know when I've never experienced it?Basically I'm just afraid. Afraid of being hurt, afraid of letting go of my career blinded by love, etc. It doesn't help that my first real attempt at dating was a disaster. The guy I was into (and who seemed into me as well) turned out to be married (but he purposely kept me in the dark on that). Once I found out I felt very stupid and naive and I haven't dated since. This was half a year ago.I know that I shouldn't give up after one try, but I seriously need some pointers on how to get into this and maybe get a bit more worldly.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): Think out of the box!!Start socializing!! give yourself a break, dont be so hard on yourself!! my goodness....you stil young and fresh...make GOOD use of it!!!Join a group, get involved with a church, a yoga group, go to gym...hiking....get hooked up with people, I was alone for 26years before I started dating again....my oh my....I lost yout on so much fun and happiness...dont be afraid...BE BRAVE!!! be single...but ready to mingle!!!!
A
female
reader, Starlights  +, writes (2 March 2012):
 Its no wonder you feel afraid about falling in love, its very natural to feel afraid of something you have never experienced.
There is nothing wrong with being a virgin at 24, you clearly want to lose it to someone special and rightly so!
Dont let your past pains hold you back.
Moving forward you can "get out there" by just having fun and not dwelling too much on this issue, most good guys are drawn to women who are independant and know themselves, so all i can suggest is not to worry about feeling abnormal and go out and enjoy being single.
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