A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi all,I would so greatly appreciate any help you could offer...I am almost 20 years old and have yet to have a relationship, or to be honest, even a first kiss. When I'm honest with myself, I know it's largely because I am really picky and am determined to have some ideal guy, but also I'm terrified. I'm very shy on first acquaintance and have had self confidence issues all of my life. The worst part is that I've been asked out, asked for my number, but whenever anyone shows the slightest interest in me, I panic. I don't have any idea how to behave. It's like I'm suddenly the most awkward person in the world in my mind. I have no idea how to react or what to do, so I usually just run. I think I may have trust issues- but I'm not even sure why I would. I feel so lonely, and even though I know that I am not in anyways unique feeling like this, all I can think is that I am a freak. I'm way to embarrassed to talk to any of my friends about this, since they are so much more experienced.I guess what I am looking for is for someone to give me advice on how to be open to a relationship and how to even go about building one? I know of course I should be myself and be natural, but it's so hard. I'm ready just to throw myself at the first semi-attractive guy I see, but even that is so terrifying I know I'd never be so foolish.So how do I even meet guys? Maybe I should loosen up and when approached at a bar give the guy a chance? But I always think what kind of a guy is looking to pick up a girl at a bar... clearly I'm not made for a one night stand...I'm sorry my thoughts are so convoluted, but any suggestions, reactions, or advice would be so helpful! Thank you for your time ~*
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confidence, one night stand, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, roxypumkin4ev +, writes (4 November 2008):
 Finally to have someone in my shoes. Thing is most of the guys I meet are garbage and am the type of person who refuses to settle for less because I deserve better. Anyways,go out as much as you can and socialize,socialize. Something I can't do due to my working so much.Good luck!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 November 2008): Awww hun, you definitely sound like me at that very same age so don't feel bad, don't feel like a freak because you're not. There's nothing wrong with your standards or being picky, because when you're not, you settle and you don't want to do that. You can always try what I did (I'm 25 and I've happily been in my very first relationship for four years:D) I met my boyfriend online. I'm extremely shy, felt very awkward talking to guys face to face but I was totally against the concept of looking for a date online. Giving it a try was the best thing I could do because I found such a sweet and caring guy that I might have let pass me by if I met him say on the street or at a party. It made it easy for me because I could be myself and find out what the person was all about before I wasted my time going on mindless dates. Just be safe and I hope this helped.
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