A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes: I have a dilema. I have been with my BF for over 2 years. We live together. I am older than him.Before we became a couple, we were sort of friends. I went out to a bar with him once, and he met a girl while he was with me. After they talked for a while... he told her bluntly that he was sexually attracted to her. I didn't care then, because we were just buddies.After we became a couple, from the very beginning, I sensed that he wasn't really into me sexually. He always gawked and flirted with attractive younger girls while we were out together. I always had to initiate intimacy, sometimes to be rejected. I was curious why he sometimes rejected me, and discovered that he masterbated.I WAS extremely sexually attracted to him. He always makes excuses why he doesn't want it. Stress, tired, too early, too late, etc. I used to dress sexy around him, without any reaction from him what-so-ever. Now I don't even bother. It has gotten to the point that my desires for him died. Sometimes I get the urge, but I dare not let them surface, because he may reject me. He hints around sometimes, that he wants it, but I am not interested. I am not ugly. I am slender, and take good care of myself. Any suggestions?
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female
reader, dearkelja +, writes (2 November 2008):
He has done a number on your self esteem by rejecting you. You will never trust his feelings for you so I think it is best to start over with someone new. I don't think the two of you have a solid relationship if you can not discuss this and if he is not considerate of your feelings and needs.
I agree with the previous poster who said he is with you not because it is the relationship of his dreams but because it's the relationship that is there for now.
You can do better.
A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (2 November 2008):
Well it sounds like he only got with you because the option was there. Not because he wanted a real relationship.
From everything you have said about him, I really don't think this relationship is worth staying in.
You are an attractive woman, you will not be short of offers.
Yes you find him sexy but is a pretty face really worth sticking round for?
Good Luck!! xx
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