A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I was just on my partner's internet history and I saw that he had been looking up "pegging".For those who don't know this is when a woman penetrates a man's ass with a strapon.I've known for a while he likes femdom [even though I hate it] and looks it up, but there was SO much on pegging - lots of pages on it, pictures etc.What if I can't give him what he wants?He also looked up "cute girl" "sexy girl" "upskirt" and even an actress "hallie todd" who personally I think is atrocious.Is this wrong? Why would he look at these? Am I not attractive enough? Will he still fancy me and love me? We're getting married in a year, I want to be everything for him and it upsets me to know he looks at other girls when i'm not here.I feel like if he finds someone else attractive, then when we have sex he'll be thinking about them instead of me and that really upsets me. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009): hes not asking you to do these things, hes only watching them, its a fantasy youll never live up to these girls in porn films, jeezs i certainly cant,
theres nothing wrong with him watching them, its all natural normally id suggest you watch them with him sometimes but if you really dont like them then leave him to it
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2009): the guy who said below 'we dont compare' is speaking lies...men do this all the time....expecting their wives and girlfriend to look and act like porn stars...my marriage ended in divorce precisely because of this.
If men really love and are attracted to the woman they are with, they should have no reason to look at other women naked. simple!
Oh, and if they use the old line men are visual...tell them, ok well seeing that women are supposedly romance based then it should be ok for us t go out and be romanced and wooed at dinners and outings by other men.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't think about guys or women like that, I think it's wrong.
But, about the "looking at the act" thing, he doesn't look up acts that much (he usually just looks at pictures on google search).
He looks at single women on their own most of the time, seeing him look up pegging is the first time I can remember seeing a guy in the picture too.
He hasn't asked me about this, no, but he has asked me to do other femdom stuff in the past that i'm just not comfortable with.
Thank you for the advice.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2009): Okay you aksed a lot of questions so I'll quote and respond to each seperately.
What if I can't give him what he wants?
-Don't worry about that, he likes to look at porn on the internet that's very normal, has he asked you to "peg" him? I doubt it so he's obviously getting enough from you and is most likely looking it up out of curiousity.
Is this wrong?
-No it's not it's perfectly normal most guys look up porn and any of that strange porn is usually due to curiousity and not what turns us on.
Why would he look at these?
-It can be anything from curiousity to the pursuit of something to look at while he masterbates, sometimes even just because of boredom.
Am I not attractive enough?
-Him looking up porn has no reflection on your attractiveness, he's obviously very attracted to you if he's with you and going to marry you, when we men look at porn we're not looking at the woman we're looking at the act two sweaty bodies doing crazy stuff we have no intention of doing but is interesting to see, it's fantasy just like how reading "twilight" is fantasy for some people, just a meaningless little escape from life for a little while.
Will he still fancy me and love me?
-There's no reason to think he won't and porn is definitely not going to make him fall out of love with you.
As for getting upset about him looking at other girls, he's not he's looking at the act and besides can you really say you haven't checked out other guys or imagined other guys in fantasy when you're alone/watching a movie/reading a book? I mean romance movies and books are another version of sexual fantasy. Most guys want to skip the romance part in sexual fantasy and get to the crunch, where it seems to me that most women find the romance part the more exciting aspect of sexual fantasy.
Look, porn is fantasy, you are the real thing, nothing compares to the real thing, ever.
Try not to let this normal thing make you insecure, girls that do porn just don't compare to real life girlfriends, we don't compare the two and neither should you.
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