A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've got this problem. It's not a sex/relationships type problem, more a social skills/confidence one.I'm a 21-year-old man from England, have a good social life and enjoy my work, but I have confidence issues. People say my social skills are good though.I want to know how can you be absolutely certain that when someone says they're not married that they aren't married at all??This is because a friend of mine was dating this woman and then he found out she was married after getting an abusive phone call off another man (which turned out to be her husband). He told the guy he didn't know she was married - and he genuinely didn't know, because the woman had claimed she was single. The guy said he didn't believe him, but my friend said he didn't know - genuinely.This problem isn't about him, however - it's about me.I worry that could happen to me. How can I be absolutely certain that they're not married and that they are single??I've never had a girlfriend before, but I've flirted with girls.I want to be able to get better at dating/relationships, how would I get better??I'm told I have good social skills, how do I increase my confidence in this area??all your help is much appreciated, ta.
View related questions:
confidence, flirt, never had a girlfriend Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Cag Lee "Apollo" Adarma +, writes (2 January 2008):
 Hey A male,
Firstly, its good that you taking stock of yourself and that you want a relationship founded on truth and mutual respect- for the long run this is brilliant, but for right now you need to chill out.
What you need to be doing now is being in places where you can be yourself, talk to like minded [ or not so like minded] women and the speak the language of friendship with intent to date..lol
Not easy, i won't pertend to be some relationship guru because there is no such thing. Sometimes situations and people will find you rather than you finding them.
How do you better at dating and relationships? well a good place to start is to date. There is nothing more heart attack inducing at age 21 or 71 than asking a person to accompany you to a place of social entertainment and maybe a meal of some kind...the prospect of her saying yes are as frightening as her saying no so its a strange phenomena
This, however, is the step. You gotta grow some plums and just jump in, find somebody you like and ask her to somewhere informal and maybe with some other people - it doesn't have to extravagant just get to know her.
These are not new ideas, bro, its just about mustering the confidence to put all the fears to aside and taking a leap of faith and having confidence in yourself.
Relationships are not instantaneous they come with time and communication, well the good ones [ those are the ones you want] and so find someone you like, take them somewhere fun and start living!
Hope this helps-
Happy New Year and God Bless
The Cag
[rate me]
|
