A
male
age
30-35,
*heworldisround
writes:So there's three people in our group: me, my photographer friend, and the girl I like. We're pretty good friends with each other. I suspect she have an idea that I like her (otherwise why do I spend so much time talking to her??). Only problem is, I suspect my photographer friend also likes her (he's also talking to her a lot). Just a random side note: she did have a crush on someone else before, but now he has a girlfriend...so it didn't really end well for her =(I'm pretty sure she doesn't like me the same way I like her; but I do know that she loves me as a great friend. After all, why else would she make me a plushie as a present for my birthday? (though I DID surprise her quite a bit with my surprise birthday present XD).In any case, I wasn't sure what should I do about this (the fact that I have feelings for her) until I had this sudden realization that if I don't do anything about it, there's a good chance I'll regret it for life. This situation has been messing around with my mind for quite a while now, and it's starting to affect me more than it should. Now, I'm not the most confident guy (my confidence is all over the place, depending on the situation), and my self-esteem at times is not what I wish it was, but once I've set myself a goal, I tend to try to achieve it, even if somewhat reluctantly. After all, if you don't try, you'll never know the result.I want her to know that I like her more than just a friend. I know it's there's risk involved here, and there's a chance our great friendship together won't be the same afterwards, but I still want to try. Unfortunately for me, I'm not a confrontational type of person...I just can't go up to her and say it randomly. So I kinda want to build it up.So my plan is to something like this: I know she likes romantic-ish stuff, so I was planning to make a valentine's card, write some sort of message in it, and slip it into her purse or something. I won't sign it with my name though...I don't think I have the guts to do that =PI also plan to ask her out later (how? I don't know...)...though we're already going somewhere sometime next week, but unfortunately for me, my photographer friend is also going; at least I won't be too stressed about being with her alone though.Just FYI, my photographer friend is a good friend...but that doesn't mean I'll just stand there and watch!What do you all think about this?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, hanbananano!  +, writes (11 February 2009):
ive been in the same position, id say go for it, but if you say she loves you as a friend then maybe thats a sign she only wants to be your friend. however youll never know until you ask, but it could turn awkward if she admits that she doesnt feel that way for you. You could ask her if she likes that other guy if its a nooo! then she doesnt if its a shrug with guilty look then she may like him, if she says no go from there, say do you llike me? best advice i have:)
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