A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So i have a boyfriend whom i've fighting a lot with ever since we got back together. first we went out for a yr andd a half, we broke up for about 5 months and starting being together again since feb/march. i really do love him--sometimes things are amazing and i couldnt be happier and other times we're fighting... sometimes i feel like he's not always there for me no matter what, even though im also there for him... i wanted it to be equal devotion and balance. And then in mid april i went traveling with a group/program. my boyfriend wasnt with me. and one night on that trip i drank a litttle too much alcohol and ended up kissing some other guy. at first i decided not to tell my boyfriend what had happened bc it was something i regret and never want to do again and i figured he wouldnt find out. but recently,(two months after the trip) a friend of mine told me a rumor that he heard about me. that i continued hooking up with this guy when we got home.. which isnt true. so i thought i needed to tell my boyfriend the truth about what had happened on the trip before he heard the rumor. so i told him. and i explained how drunk i was and how i regret it so much. but he's extremely embaressed and angry. he doesnt think he wants to break up and he's letting my try to gain his trust back BUT he's acting like a complete assholeee about it.... he's so angry all the time. i wish there was a mature, and better way for him to handle it and gain my trust back through time.. if he gave me a chance to let eveyrhting go back to normal, and live our normal lives, i really think he would see that he can trust me again.. but all he wants me to do is simply listen to everything he says. he made me delete the guy i hooked up with off of my phone, and he made me delete all my pictures from the trip off of facebook. he orders me around. and i know none of this is really gaining trust, this is just him loving the control. what do you guys think i should do? i dont know how to handle my situation. i know what i did was wrong. i was very wrong for cheating and im lucky he hasnt broken up with me on the spot, but i hate the way he's acting.
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female
reader, Elydiese  +, writes (16 June 2010):
I dont think it was wise to get drunk and kiss some guy but obviously thiese things happen and they cant be helped everyone makes mistakes. It says your 16-17 so really you've got your whole life ahead of you if you dont like the way he's treating you and like you said it seems he likes the control then get rid of him, its harsh but can you really imagine yourself putting up with this, losing all your self estemm, your friends, your social life because if he's using this to hurt you eventually in the end it will lead to that. x
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