A
female
age
30-35,
*eisacha
writes:i am dating this Boy for Three years now, a long distance relationship and unfortunately we are going down everyday cos i had an affair with a Boy a year ago and My bf found out and obviously was very sad and disappointed in me. But he forgave me and we r trying Every day to move on, i can say its just words cos since a year we r trying to move on but Nothing. am very grateful that After What i did he didnt leave me but Right now am suffering from My mistske cos i really love My bf it might sounds crazy but am crazy in love with him and I dont know Why i did wat i did. My bf accepted me again but cant let a second without thinking of it and hurt himself he also bring this story up for any small occasion am trying hard to help him forgetting it and givin me a real last chance. but he is becoming more distance and have noticed he is has been flirting with some girls now i cant stop cryin everyday cos am afraid he get carried away by other girls. My real pb is that i want to get him to trist me back and try to forget wat happened i know its not easy at all but i dont want to lose him for Nothing in this world and the way he treats me now i have no idea wat he feels for me now i cant read him anymore, he is closed with me and he tried to break up once but we r still here cos i begged him that am nothing without him ,am also beginin to doubt him. pls help me i want to help My bf to forget and love me more
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affair, flirt, long distance, move on Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2014): Let him go. Find yourself a man you are not tempted to cheat on. Start over. He deserves better too.
A
female
reader, sachama +, writes (22 August 2014):
thanks to all of you for your comments ,i have taken note.thank you.
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A
female
reader, sugarplum786  +, writes (22 August 2014):
 You need to separate for a period of time and let him heal. He has to be able to forgive you in order to move forward. At this point he is looking for attention outside the relationship and looks like that is the first step of him being unfaithful or walking out.
I suggest you tell him that you both need to take a break from the relationship and when he is ready to forgive and can honestly work to making this relationship a success then there is hope. At this point in time sound likes you both are miserable. If cannot forgive you - this relationship will eventually end
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A
female
reader, Fari  +, writes (21 August 2014):
 Ok, thats a mess. Do not panic jus yet. Trust and Honesty are two key components in a relationship. When two people are in a relationship, they give and they expect back the same. Your boyfriend has obviously forgiven you which is a plus on your side but on the down side he is still recalling the incident and thats natural. Its easy to forget what happen as he is still hurt. Talk to him, plead with him for forgiveness. Tell him you know you screwed up bad. Its only one of two things can happen, either he leaves you or he forgives and forget.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 August 2014): You're asking a lot for him to forgive and forget. No matter what you say or do, he will always have it in the back of him mind that you cheated on him and he will never forget it because it caused him pain. You need to accept that things have changed because of your affair and will never return to the way things were. From now on, don't look at going back and returning your lives to the old way, look for a new way to move on with your lives because he will never fully forgive and forget.
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