A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I need some advice, I have fallen for a guy at work, he is everything I have ever wanted in a guy and I thought he felt the same, we have kissed a couple of times, but he is a little shaddy about his life. I got a little suspicious and asked someone at work if he was single and they said they think he has a partner, I am so hurt and I don't know what to do, I don't want to let on to him that I know, I want him to admit it to me. I thought he was genuine I can't believe that he kissed me when he has a girlfriend, he knows that I don't have much confident in the way I look and I am rubbish with blokes. What should I do? I want him to know how much he has me feel like crap.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): that's too much emotion to put on someone that just kissed you a couple of times. You do have some responsibility in this and you could have asked before you did anything with him. So just ask him like you should have done before you kissed him! Just so you know, people do cheat and not everyone in the world is honest so you may want to get to know a person better if you get THIS upset over things. So he's a cheater, your not his girlfriend, he didn't betray you. If he has a girlfriend, don't mess around with him anymore and move on. Lesson learned. It is kinda weird that you've fallen for a guy and think that he's fallen for you and you don't even know anything about him. Your almost thirty years old and I think you should start taking more responsibility for your life.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): The person you asked said "they think he has a partner", maybe that person is wrong, you need to ask this man straight out if he has a partner. He is never going to volunteer this information unless you ask him, otherwise he would have before now.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2009): You could ask him outright if he has a partner and look him straight in the eye.
It sounds like you felt bad about yourself to start with. If it's all about your looks why not get a makeover and/or see an image consultant? Not cheap but you could do one thing at a time, for example haircut first, slimming next (if necessary) etc. You can get quite reasonable haircuts at model nights where students are supervised.
You might also want to look at your self-esteem. It could be that you look nice but don't think so yourself. After all he was attracted to you so other people might be too.
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