A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hey Cpid! I need some help.My boyfriend for 1 1/2 years broke up with me 5 months ago. It just didn't feel rewarding anymore and we've gotten so harsh on each other. We both admit that we still love each other, though. We still phone and catch up on each other many times a day. He still visits me at home. We both get jealous when we go out with other people. He acts like we're in a relationship but he keeps on feeding it to my face that we are not. Sometimes, it feels like he's pushing me away but then he'll call me up again, seem sweet, tell me that he loves me, and we'll have sex.I want him back but I do not know what to do. I'm so hard up and confused. I can't reconcile myself in the situation.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2008): I have very recently been through the same thing.
It all ended in tears (for both of us) when we slept together and then a few days later he slept with someone else (trying to move on and get over me). We had said that we were not going to sleep with anyone else yet. It completely destroyed me. He realised straight after it had happened how stupid he'd been, that he still loved me much more than he thought he did and how much he'd hurt me. It completely destroyed him too.
You could try tell him that this situation is going to end up really hurting at least one of you.
Ask him if he will try again but this time you both work hard to make the relationship rewarding and as fun as it was in the beginning.
If he says no then maybe you should stop sleeping with him and stop communicating with him so much, then he'll either realise how much he misses you and you'll get back together or he'll give you enough space to stop hurting so much and move on.
Good Luck.
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