A
male
age
41-50,
*amarpan
writes:Me and my friend are coworkers. She was my schoolmates for two years but we don't know each other very much. when she joins she has a boyfriend who is going to marry someone else they did not marry each other because of religion. I was attracted toward her right from the school though she did not know. When I proposed to her she neither refused nor accepted. When again I proposed, after 6 months, said you will cry as she knew we could not marry each other because of religion. She is mature. We became friend even close friend kisses etc. but no sex. She married someone else after 2yrs. Initially she avoided me but later on she become again close friend to me this is because first, she do not want to hurt me and second her husband away from her (another country)and I was good close friend to her whom she talks 24hrs. I kiss her also but this is always started by me she never rarely when she is happy because of mine contribution to her happiness. Otherwise she feels repentant after kisses sometimes becoz of her husband. now overall i have spent 5yrs with her in love, for me (shy guy) who falls first time a love it is a true love, trust me and I feel she also loves me truly.now her husband is back,so we(infact i did not try also)not talk much as we used to do. but she write mail to me after 10-15 days which i did not reply this continue for 2-3 months. But i wanted to talk her very much but avoid that. i still love her truely.now she is in family way,but she still mail me, finally i reply and we started chatting with each other..But i do not want to hurt , because i suddenly feel hurt when she stops talking to me ,now she wants to talk whenever she wants. I feel when she feels lonely she wants to talk to me but at her own terms and conditions. My problem is that i want to talk to her but without these terms and condition. either i want completely breakup or completely good friend. should i tell her that i do not want this kind of friendship where she talk when she need not when i need. should i mail her telling that you have always wanted me whenever you need any emotional support or whenever you feel lonely. I do not want to hurt her but this is my feeling which is inside me keep hurting me whenever i chat with her..should i say her or completey shut off without telling her anything ....
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male
reader, loveonce +, writes (27 February 2012):
 as your best friend is married to some one else,so you should try to move on.By this you would save yours as well as her life .ur friend mails you,she does not prepare plans to leave her husband n start living wid u(which probably u will not want).So divert ur interest to other persons.It will be good for her marital life and ur personal life n future too
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