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I think my husband is deliberately making himself unnatractive to me.

Tagged as: Big Questions, Health, Marriage problems, Sex, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (24 October 2018) 5 Answers - (Newest, 26 October 2018)
A female United States age , *anajane writes:

My husband never showers or brushes his teeth when he is home with me , even if it’s a whole week . We’ve been married less than two years. The last time we had sex was three months ago , he says he’s tired from working but watches porn ( sometimes gay porn )and masterbates several times a day . I keep myself in extremely good shape always up for sex . I feel like he try’s to make himself as unattractive as possible to me . What’s up with him ?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2018):

If he is in the same age group as you then that can be the effects of what is called male menopouse. Actually male menopause can cause havok in some men. He should seek a doctor's help. Is he on good terms with you? I mean he doesnt have any issues with you? Maybe you have said something that immencely hurt him and caused him to withdraw. He can also be a latent gay. Does he suffer from inferiority complex regarding his size? Because this also drive some men to seek gay porn for comparision of sizes of different men in these clips. Like the others I suggest you sit and talk to him nicely that he needs to know the harm he is doing to himself by ignoring his looks, without making it sound like a personal issue with him because truly it is not worth it to waste the remaining years of his life in remorse and seclution. Just not worth it. If there is a problem it should be faced and solved. If the relationship is not working why keep it.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 October 2018):

This sounds unlikely to me. I mean unless he wants out and he's hoping you'll leave him because you're so disgusted.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (26 October 2018):

Honeypie agony auntHave you asked him POINT black?

Not if he is gay, but if he is trying to make himself unattractive for you. I know I would.

However, it could be that he is depressed, not able to keep up with you sexually (masturbation is WAY easier than pleasing a partner) or has had a drop in testosterone with age.

So I think you NEED to talk to him. And you need to decide if whatever is going on is something you WANT/CAN deal with and how to go about it.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2018):

It sounds like he is addicted to porn, was you together long before you got married? What was he like before you got married?

But it doesn't seem like he is bothered about a real relationship and if he cannot admit what he is thinking then you have to draw your own conclusions based on his behaviour..

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2018):

Maybe he is really gay? He cannot come out hence not showering or brushing his teeth. Maybe his mother would not let her kids shower so maybe he thinks this is normal.Are his siblings the same way?Maybe he is mentally ill?Make him a doctor's appointment as soon as you can..call the doctor first and tell the doctor your concerns. The gay porn has me wondering. You need to sit him down and really talk. You will be in my thoughts.

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