A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:There is something that I would LOVE to try with my boyfriend, and I've told him about this. I would love to try some light bondage, some light domination. (I say light because I've never done it before, so I'd just like to try it out and see if I like it. The thought of it REALLY turns me on.)He's done the whole bondage thing before, as well as domination, and he says he would love to do it with me, and that he will, but "when I'm ready". I've told him that I AM ready, but he says I'm not. I asked him how he knows, and he says he just does. Is this normal for people who have done bondage before? Can they really tell when the other person is ready?Any responses would be gratefully received. :) Reply to this Question
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male
reader, BreastMan  +, writes (5 December 2010):
Be sure to know, what his real desires are. Dous he want to be just your Dom, who is going to tie you up on occasion and perhaps spank you. Or are you getting yourself into more extreme activities such as bloody floggings or asphyxiation games. Perhaps he wants more then you are willing to subject yourself to, he doesnt want to offend you and he just says you are not ready... well true enough, you are not ready.
As the others suggested, read some stories, there are planty free stories on the net, see some of the vidoes and pictures, and ask yourself how far you are willing to go.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): PPS: Once you've read the books, and seen the film, you will be ready and will be able to approach him in the "right" way and then he will accept you... I will say no more.. lol
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): PS: Thank you Fade, Ellora's Cave has many books about discipline and BDSM, that you really should read before you explore this type of sexual practice...
PPS: I tried bondage once, it was bloody boring, but the rest of the domination scene, is very heavy and can become a lifestyle thing..
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2008): BDSM, is what I class as advanced sexual practice, it is not light hearted honeypie, and if your boyfriend has practised this before, you must trust him when he says that you are not ready. I suggest you search the Internet for stories of bondage, humiliation and BDSM activity. It really is something, that might leave you vulnerable, crying and destroy your world. It is one of those sexual practices, that seek to destroy your world. It is not something you can lightly practice, because it's whole aim is to turn you upside down and bring you insecurity and distress... I know for some it sounds strange, but it is can be very comforting and sexual in a funny kind of way. Prepare yourself by reading stories about slavery, humiliation, and submission. Once you understand exactly what BDSM means, you will be able to approach your boyfriend in the right way, and he will agree that you are ready. Your not ready yet honeypie, but I commend you for trying. Your boyfriend has experienced this before, and if he thinks it is not suitable then he is right. Please watch "Secretary" with James Spader and Maggie Gyllenhaal, and then you will understand more deeply why me and your boyfriend have such great reservations about this advanced sexual technique you want to explore....
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (30 October 2008):
I don't think any amount of bondage makes you psychic.
Perhaps he's done some little things and you have not liked it so he's taken that as a sign you are not ready.
Perhaps since you want to be dominated he's just taking control of you and saying no because he's the boss.
Perhaps he's just an arse.
Just pull out some fluffy handcuffs or an old tie during foreplay and start tying yourself up. I doubt he'll be able to resist.
Good Luck!! xx
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