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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm 16 and my boyfriend and i have been going out for 9 months now. Our relationship has its ups and downs- we fight a lot for a while, and then other times we are really content and have no issues. Last month we were really happy, and he wanted to see me all the time. But, the other night at a new years party he got in one of his 'moods' where he doesn't pay any attention to me and ignores or blows me off the whole night. He wouldn't even give me a kiss goodnight and he acted like this in front of all our friends and everyone noticed what a jerk he was being. He did apologize the next day and explained that he was having a bad day, but I'm sick of him treating me, the person he's supposed to care about the most, like this for no reason, randomly. I've been getting a feeling that I want to break up with him or at least take a break but I'm not sure if I should just forgive him and keep our relationship going again. It would be hard if we broke up also because we see each other at school a lot, have the same group of friends and most of our friends are 'couples', also he has gotten pretty close with my family and I've just started to feel comfortable with his family. I don't know what to do, any advice would help. thanks!
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female
reader, siamaq18  +, writes (13 January 2009):
 Well let me add this, Ive been in a relationship like this for 2yrs, my ex-boyfriend treated me like dirt on his bad days, especially in front of his friends,but he always managed to call me in the nights or maybe the next day to apologize.I've even thought about breaking up with him, then I said to myself, damn 2yrs is a lot, and then I said again damn his moms like me, but whenever you're dating a guy in the same H.S as yours, its really hard to break up with him, because you see him everyday, but then you should look at it as, if he constantly keep acting the way he does, do you think he's going to change in the future? My answer is NO, and he's going to continue to act like that because he knows that he can always come to you and say sorry and you're going to always forgive him, because he's already figured you out.my view of a real relationship is having a bf who's going to accept you on your worst days, and who's gonna want you to help them go through the challenge in their worst days and not push you away, and sometimes we think that Oh am comfortable with his family, they're comfortable with me, we've been together for a long time, and its hard to walk away, but at the end of the day, YOU'RE the one that gotta deal with his bullshit, you deserve so much better, you want a guy who's going to be your friend, who's going to be sad with you, and everything else, and you're pretty young, don't ever feel like you gotta put up with this because of the length of time y'all been together because the more longer you stay with him, the more hard it is to walk away.
Good Luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2009): You are young and you shouldn't be going through stresses of this sort, you should be enjoying your prime time. Don't let him take advantage of your niceness. Talk to him and explain your likes and dislikes, have him shares his with you. Use that as a starting point to determine whether you see him as a fit for yourself. Ask yourself what are at least 5 characteristics you want in a guy or from the relationship and see if he offers it to you. If not back out of the relationship and if being around your circle of friends is difficult find other things to occupy your time and distance yourself mostly from him until you have the strength to be around your friends. If you opt to leave him, you sound like you will be hurt, the pain goes hunnie. Take your time and don't rush into the relationship there is so much more to life than being committed and tied down early in life. Live your life and enjoy it. Learn yourself and understand what you want and need out of life, establish yourself. Essential, set a standard, if you don't then you'll fall for anything!
I wish you the best in your decision making... this is my opinion only for guidance not a professional theory.
You'll be fine in '09!!!
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