A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been dating for nearly a year now. He and I have long distance relationship 'cuz he is studying abroad but we have been pretty good friends since young. About three months after we became couples, he let me check into his email so i ran through his chat log and saw a chat where he is showing a photo of my friend (both he and i know her well, and she is the super popular cute and pretty hot one) and saying "she is so stunning". I felt adrenaline kicked in me and since then I have been feeling so insecure about myself and started feeling ugly and started stalking 'that' girl and wanting to be her. Not only her. Every single girl he followed on instagram, liked on fb etc etc. I have talked with him a bit about this but I dont think he knows about my insecure part. I dont know how to tell him at all. I am okay sometimes, but sometimes, I would just see 'that' girl's new photos and feel ugly and insecure and break down all over again. Is that normal? Am I crazy?
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insecure, long distance, stalking Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (25 April 2013):
You're not crazy but you may benefit from therapy.
Let me ask you a question: is it reasonable that there are women in this world (out of 3.5 billion women) that your boyfriend would find stunning?
Does that mean that because he finds someone stunning that you're ugly? No, there's absolutely no correlation between the two. Remind yourself that whenever you're tempted to act out or feel ugly.
Isn't it also reasonable to assume that if your boyfriend thought you were ugly he wouldn't be with you?
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