A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Basically, I started dating my best friend 2 weeks ago, and he's already saying that he loves me etc, I feel so suffocated, I've told him and he listens, for about an hour, and then goes back to saying it. :/ This guy is amazing, I know he'd do anything for me, but he did that before we started going out. The only thing different is that he wants sex. I got with him on the same day that I finished with a crap relationship (it all happened really weirdly, nothing was planned, please don't judge.)and I feel so suffocated it's unreal.I've never wanted to be single this much in my life. I'm bored of relationships right now, even though my current boyfriend is everything you could ask for in a man, I'm not even slightly interested anymore, and I think it's just because of us getting together so soon, I haven't had a day of being single. -.-I'm only 19, I don't want to settle down, I want to find really fun guys to have fun relationships with. And for me, part of that fun is meeting the person, y'know, going on dates, getting to know eachother in a dating sense, then making it official. It happened to fast with this guy, I missed my favourite part. :(I really want to end it with him, but my mum says it'll be the biggest mistake I'll make because he's such a nice guy, but I'm not ready to be married off to this guy! :( Am I making a massive mistake by dumping him?
View related questions:
best friend Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, malvern +, writes (10 March 2013):
Although your mother has your best interest at heart you are clearly not ready for this relationship. You are going to have to be more assertive with this friend of yours and tell him you want to remain as things were before and that you are just not ready for anything more. Tell him that you may feel differently in the future but right now is not the time.
A
female
reader, VSAddict +, writes (10 March 2013):
It's not your mom's place to tell you who you should and shouldn't be with. If you're not happy and you've done all that you can to get things better, then leave. It probably was a mistake jumping into another relationship so soon. Talk to your bf once more, and let him know you're serious about you feeling suffocated and you're not ready to say I love you and you'd appreciate if he'd respect that. But even if that got fixed, I think the biggest issue is that you know him so well that you feel cheated of the excitement. If this issue is bothering you to the point that even if everything was perfect, you still wouldn't be happy because you know him so well, then you should leave. Don't let your mother have a say in this. You're old enough to make your own decisions and staying in a relationship you're not happy in will lead to disaster. If getting to know someone and doing the dating thing is really important to you in a relationship, then your bf may not be the one for you.
...............................
A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (10 March 2013):
You mean you get together every single day just talking? Only meet him when you find something interesting to do. Only get on the phone for important messages. If you agree to meet with him he assumes you are thrilled to see him just as much. It takes two to make a relationship official. Tell him you want to get to know him more before making it official. Getting to know each other and having fun is a lifelong process. It shouldn't stop just because you are exclusive, married, or have kids. From your post my impression of this guy is that he is a bore and you don't really have what it takes to stay in the relationship.
He is everything a woman can ask for? No, he is what society tells you what a good man is. Sadly, a "good man" is not the most attractive the women.
...............................
|