A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 15 almost 16 in November, my boyfriend has just turned 16. I live in Syracute and he lives in Albany, we really love each other and we've been going out for 9months, I really want to have a baby with him and live with him, but my parents want nothing to do with him, and I don't want to live at my house, my mother is crazy and my dad is kind of abusive, I really want a baby, and I want to be with my boyfriend, what do I do, help me out?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2009): ummm yeah been there. know what your feeling and ALMOST got what i want trust having a baby isn't just fun a games it alot of hard work and takes a really stable relationship. my sister had her 1st born at 15 and it was a mistake she could take care it she still want to go hang out party go to clubs and still want that child that child is not my i guess brother becuz he lives wit him since he was 6 months no even so think twice before you give up your life for something stupid.ps i have a baby girl and im 17 and i dont even think i ready to be a mom but im dealing with the consequences.
A
female
reader, schoesbabygirl  +, writes (2 February 2009):
Hey i no how u feel im 16 nearly 17 and wanted a baby sooo badley i wud do anything 4 one, all my mates were getting pregnant and having babies and i just thought "omg i want one" but then i looked after my friends baby 4 the day and i hated it the bab y was gorgouse but he needed attention all the time i ust wanted 5 mins 2 my self but i didnt get it and that was just one day imagine that 4 the rest of your life. just think about it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): im pregnant and 16 and im living with my boyfriends parents, i have all the money that was left to me from my granparents who have died and i have already got all my essentials...people dont realise that no situation is bad because of your age. i wasnt scared i was proud and dont let anyone else bring you down, me and my boyfriend compramise, if we disagree we just talk through it with each other, a baby doesnt effect the relationship unless you let it. we were together 3 months when i found out i was pregnant but we decided together that if worst comes and we do split we will stay friends for the baby, there is alot of support out there i was helped loads by my midwife...theres nothing in life that will be as worse as death and having a baby is the compeat opposite cause its life, darlin have a baby because i dont regret it one bit and the only way i would is if i let it stress me. you can do this...trust me, and if you need a chat email me at [moderator note: email address blocked]all the best darlin
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2008): The problem is that people generally want babies too young for the wrong reasons.
It's understandable that you want more of a "storybook" life in the future. Espeically since it sounds like you haven't had enough of one in your own childhood.
But the problem is that at your age having child with your BF won't help cement that better life that you want so much. A child will more likely just push that life even farther out of reach for you. It will stress the living hell out of you both and it will break a young couple up at least as often as not.
In a lot of ways having a baby is like throwing a stick of dynamite into a relationship. The best-case scenario is that it pushes you two very close to the breaking point but you survive. And every other possible outcome is downhill from there.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 May 2008): ii totally kno how u feel ii am also 16 and want a BaBy I have been wit my boyfriend for 2 yrs he works and we are ok financally I also want to move out my house I hate living there so you are not alone I kno excatly what your going thru
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2008): listen although you may want a baby know, you don't understand how many things you are going to have to sacrifice, education for one, you also have to take into consideration that a baby is not cheap you have to pay for mostly everything they will need...your only 16 years old you still dont understand what life holds for you and who you are suppose to end up with, 9 months may seem like a long time....but compared to a LIFETIME its nothing, get this idea out of your head and start thinking correctly go to school go to college, get a good job
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A
female
reader, KnH89 +, writes (2 March 2008):
I think you should wait. I got pregnant at 17 my daughter is now 5 months and I actually mite be pregnant again. Me and him are no longer together and he pays no child support. Guys around that age arent mature enough for a baby I mean most arent. Most of the time they freak out and bounce. Being 16 you will have a horribly hard time getting your own place no one would rent to me. I dropped out of high school but Im going to college now its hard to find someone to watch the baby all the time, people get sick of it. You really wanna do your own thing first and not have to worry about someone else. Babies are expensive and you gotta have one at the rite time and for the right reason. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, love-him +, writes (28 February 2008):
 Hey babe, i know EXACTLY what you are thinking.. i have just turned 17 and my boyfriend of two years is 21. There are all the factors of money, a house, care etc that you need to consider. For the past 5 years i have been planning my future, and when i met my boyfriend, i have been able to plan futher.. you and the father need to have a job as a vital part for money income.. You need to know where the baby would sleep etc.. Feel free to mail me any time babe and i wish you all the best :) x x x
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2008): if ypou have a baby now ur throwing your life away...16 come on are you serious, trust me if you do that your life is gonna be hell, if you dont wanna listen then fine but all i would have to say is i told u so
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A
female
reader, cozzy_girl  +, writes (25 February 2008):
it costs alot of money to have a baby.and u wont have any time to do anything without support. i was 17 when i got pregnant and after my baby was born the father left and pays nothing towards our child.everyones the same before hand thinking it would be nice to have a baby but wait a few years and live your life first, you would regret it otherwise.its alot harder than u think!you have plenty of time to have a baby.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): after having a baby at 17, i must say it has been the hardest thing i have ever done. It was difficult for me to finish high school without finishing i knew that i could never have been able to deal that way i have. But i had my son with a boyfriend of two years, who never left my side when he found out i was pregnant and we stayed together and got married after 4 years. But jsut a few months later we knew that we werent supposed to be together. Having a child can have a tremendous strain on a relationship, in younger very new parents it has a tendeny to tear them apart. Having a baby changes everything. Maybe you should worry about making a lifetime of happiness with each other and your lives before you need to start making a lifetime of happiness for a child.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): follow your heart, be sure to talk to him and make sure he feels the same way before you making any rash desitions.
your still young my sister had her first when she was 17 i saw what she went through and it was hard. just think about it and make sure you've got enough money to bring a child into the world otherwise it would be twice as hard.
good luck what ever you decide
xx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): heya,
i think its not right at the moment for you to have a child because you have no way of supporting yourself or your boyfriend let alone a child if you leave.
You are under age for having sex, i know you want children very much but your still at school you have a future ahead of you that could go far in.
What does your boyfriend think of running away and having a child?
you have only been going out with him for 9 months i no you think this is alot but you have to think your only young and might need to go out longer with him just to make sure you are doing the right thing.
i hope this helps
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): You should compramise and see him on certain days and all that. But why should you bring a baby into the world which you cannot afford? Benefits don't go that far and how do you know you'll stay with him once the baby is born. It's really selfish to have a baby just because you want to move out and you 'want' one. I got pregnant on accident and it ended in a miscarriage, it was awful and I did want the baby but I knew it would be hard and I wouldn't be able to get what I want because it would be all about my baby and I'm only 17 and the Dad left as soon as I found out.
If you really wanted a baby, you should wait as you obviously aren't thinking of the poor babies needs just your own.
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